[network] @jwatson; Paranoia Strikes Deep [Night 246]

[jumpthegun]

Right. I just want to be clear given that obituary. I don't know you people. I've never met any of you. Yes, I've seen some of the logs and I've read through your guides, so don't bother telling me to do that. I don't know what the hell you're playing at or how you managed to get audio and video footage of me like that, but I'm not indulging you.

My name is Dr. John Watson. If you require medical advice, I can provide it. Otherwise, I'm a bit busy. Thank you.

Comments

[quadrangle]

[Yeah, he gets it.]

HA STINKING HA.
I'M KARKAT. ALSO I'M 7, WHICH IS 16 IN YOUR HUMAN YEARS.
ALSO AN ALIEN, BUT FEEL FREE TO TAKE THAT WITH WHATEVER SIZE GRAIN OF SNACK MINERAL YOU DEEM APPROPRIATE.
SHOULD I EVEN BOTHER SHOWING YOU OR ARE YOU JUST GOING TO CALL IT A COSTUME TOO.

[jumpthegun]

I'm sure it's a very impressive costume.

text-> private video

[quadrangle]

YOU PATRONIZING FUCK.

[He switches over to video, very carefully making sure it's set to private first (huzzah, paranoia!), then. Well. Flips off the camera. Observe his fully extended middle finger and the bright yellow claw that sits atop it.]

Want me to try yanking my horns off or what?

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[jumpthegun]

[Sorry, Karkat, but your status as an alien is secondary. Steph had been young, but this...]

You really are sixteen. Are your parents here? Or do you have an adult with you?

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[quadrangle]

[What, really? He gives his tablet an incredulous look, the rude gesture he'd been making transforming into an absent scratch at his scalp. Humans and their priorities, honestly.]

I don't have parents. And... no? I'm traveling with Davesprite, actually. The Cat, too, but I'm not sure if he's been paying attention.

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[jumpthegun]

[That's concerning.]

Do all of you have enough supplies? How are you on food and clothing? I have extra clothes in these packs I woke up with.

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[quadrangle]

[Well, shit.]

Uh, yeah, maybe hold on to those for a few days? Just in case you... need them or something.

[When his memory returns, that is, but since Karkat is fairly certain that won't go over so well—]

I have some extra stuff anyway. We'll be fine.

[Ignore the fact that he's planning on foisting most of it off on someone at the earliest opportunity. Maybe. He's been thinking about it.]

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[jumpthegun]

I have more food and clothing than I should reasonably be carrying.

[With his leg. He's aware there's an issue with this environment and collecting supplies is the smart thing to do, but John's viscerally aware of his own limitations. His leg won't let him forget about them.]

If you need something, let me know. I can leave it in one of the other houses for you to pick up. Someone told me you can leave things in cupboards to keep.

private vIDEO HE'S BEEN VIDEOING fuck my life

[quadrangle]

[If nothing else, it's nice to know John's kindness isn't feigned. That aside—]

Just trust me, okay? And if I'm making this up, you really won't need the supplies and we can meet up or whatever. Sound good?

private

[jumpthegun]

All right. You have my SN if you or your friend need it. I've been told I can prescribe medicines from a distance, as well. So, that's on the table if either of you needs it.

Take care.

private

[quadrangle]

[Dammit, John.]

You take care too, all right? I mean, I don't know if death losses stack, but I'd prefer it if you weren't the one to find out.

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[jumpthegun]

[John blows out an irritated sigh and just disconnects at that point. He's said his goodbye and he doesn't particularly care about being told not to die by someone else.