Event: Consolidation Theory, Part One and Two

[snowblindmods]

Characters: red-marked characters
Location: ???
Date: Morning & Day 353
Summary: You wake up in a cell.
Warnings: general horror warnings; please note in subject lines for anything specific that comes up

Consolidation Theory OOC Post
Part Two OOC Post

Comments

[devoutish]

When I get back, I'm gonna retire to the north and buy a farm and a fucking pony.

[On the list of things that he thinks will never happen: this.]

[phaseshifter]

A pony? You can't even hug those!

[ Especially if they're made of diamonds like Jack's was. LAME!! ]

I have to suggest puppies instead. Maybe ten or so? That seems like enough. Ish.

[devoutish]

Did you know I've got dogs?

[phaseshifter]

[ There's a loud intake of breath that's too long to be a gasp, but carries a similar emotion anyways. hhHHHHHHHHHHHHH. ]

No, you never told me you have dogs. Plural? How many? What are their names?

[ HAHA THIS SURE IS A GOOD WAY OF DISTRACTING ALFIE, THIS IS NOT ABOUT ANGEL'S LOVE FOR PUPPIES AT ALL ]

[devoutish]

Two of 'em, yeah. They're Max and Cyril. Max is knee-high and yellow, and Cyril's gigantic and wrinkly.

[phaseshifter]

I am so freaking jealous right now. Are they good boys? Do they do tricks? Which one is the cuddliest??

[devoutish]

I don't cuddle the dogs. I give 'em a pat.

[He's squandering their potential, honestly. It's tragic.]

[phaseshifter]

Dude.

[ B E T R A Y A L ]

When you get home, you cuddle your dogs from me at least once. That's not a request.

[devoutish]

Do you suggest I let 'em up on the furniture, too?

[phaseshifter]

YOU DON'T ALREADY DO THAT??

[devoutish]

For the same reason I don't lie in their doggy beds, yeah.

[phaseshifter]

If you wouldn't lie in your dog's bed, then you need to buy a more comfortable one for them. I'm fairly sure that's a rule of some kind.

[devoutish]

Their beds smell like dogs.

[phaseshifter]

Oh. Well, that doesn't mean you can't cuddle them! If they make you smell of dog, then you can just. Take a bath.

[ tfw you're kidnapped and full of drugs and engaging in THE DOGSCOURSE ]

[devoutish]

For how much I think you must cuddle dogs, you'd need five baths per day.

[phaseshifter]

I've never even touched a dog. Sealed underground bunkers aren't exactly puppy-friendly environments.

[devoutish]

How much you must want to cuddle dogs, then.

Did you not meet Clint's dog, when he was here? Or the talking one?

[phaseshifter]

Nuh-uh. I did talk to the talking one, though! That was pretty great.

[ Hello drugs she would like to order one round of hallucinatory doggos now please? Thanks for your time ]

[devoutish]

Well, if either of mine ever find their way here - you'll be the first to know about it.

[Except he hopes that never happens. Let his dogs stay safe at home, please.]

[phaseshifter]

Cool. And you wouldn't have to worry about sharing a bed with them! I'd donate all our blankets and pillows to them no matter how much Rhys would cry about it.

[ angel he's in the cell next door you fuck ]

[devoutish]

In Norfinbury? No, in Norfinbury the'd sleep with us. Special circumstances and all.

[Dogs are great for warmth.]