[network] Event: Long & Lost [NIGHT 217]

[snowblindmods]

it's been so long between the words we spoke
will you be there up on the shore, I hope

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Comments

@catseye ; voice [cw: child abuse/abandonment]

[grimalkid]

[He's curled in a ball on a couch in this house, his coat drawn over his head as the urge to speak roils in his throat. Finally, it becomes too much and he has to say something. He can't remember how to set it to private, so instead his words come out to the whole network.]

My mother died in childbirth, and my father never wanted me. I thought Mimi would help me, but when the tsunami came she closed her door to me! But I still miss her. I wish she hadn't died.

No one has ever wanted me to stay! Even the cats who like me never follow me when I leave. I'll always be alone. I'll never find true friends. People will always try to hurt me. I'll always have to hide! [His voice fades into a pained yowl before the recording stops.]

@betterhalf; text (He's not going to be helpful)

[darkincrement]

You're right. You will be alone.
And hurting others is normal.
People are selfish.

voice

[grimalkid]

I don't want to hurt people, not really. I didn't even want to hurt that bug-killing kid, even if he deserved to die. But when I try to help sometimes things just get more messed up.

[darkincrement]

Then stop worrying about others.
People here are just as bad.
They steal, hurt, and kill each other.

[grimalkid]

Everyone here? Even the kids? [Yeah, he's not going to believe that. He knows most kids are pretty innocent about stuff like this.]

[darkincrement]

Even the kids.
This place has a way of changing people.
You'll see for yourself.

@Spoiler ; video

[spoileralert]

Hey, hey!

[ He sounds so much more distressed by whatever's happening than most of the people posting today. She can't help but want to reach out to him, even if she doesn't understand most of what he's talking about. ]

It's okay. You don't have to hide, not here. For one thing nobody has the time or energy to run around hurting people because of how they were born.

voice

[grimalkid]

[He lets out a soft hiss.] How can you be so sure? Even when I try to help people, they never appreciate it! Even if I actually save them!

voice

[spoileralert]

Because I've been here 7 months. I know these people, and I know how things work here.

People share things about themselves, things they're terrified to share, things they're sure will make everyone hate them, and no one really minds. The only thing that matters is whether you hurt people here, and whether you had a choice in the matter.

[grimalkid]

[He laughs, his voice sounding hollow.] Does it count if they're forced to share?

[spoileralert]

No, it doesn't.

[ Her tone is wry. ]

I'm only counting people who decided they had to share on their own, because it was causing a problem, or they were threatened, or they just decided to take a chance.

[grimalkid]

Why would they choose that? Isn't it safer to keep secrets?

[spoileralert]

The reasons I said. There are plenty of reasons a person might choose to be honest when they don't have to.

[grimalkid]

Good for them. [He sounds jealous.] And what if that just gets them even more hurt?

@jphawkins, audio

[rattlingthestars]

Wow, you just scared the crap out of my cat.

[ Indeed, there are distressed cat noises happening in the background in response to that yowl. Jim realizes that's not the most comforting thing he could be saying at the moment, though, and his voice is gentler when he adds: ]

But, uh, it's funny. This place might not seem like somewhere to meet people that will stick by you, but you might be surprised.

voice

[grimalkid]

...I'm sorry. [He doesn't really sound like he's speaking to Jim about that.]

Why? This place seems made to drive people apart. To make them fight over what little there is left.

Re: voice

[rattlingthestars]

He's had worse scares.

[ The fact that Catseye apologies to cats isn't really a surprise, but it does make Jim like him better. ]

Some people are like that. A lot of them, I guess. But there are good people around, too. Ones that want to work together and share.

[grimalkid]

Hey, I've met people like that too.

...they don't always like intruders into their group. [Still trying to maintain plausible deniability about being nonhuman.]

[rattlingthestars]

As long as you're bringing something to the table, I don't think you're an intruder.

[grimalkid]

I've tried doing that too. People don't like a kid [who looks like a monster] telling them what to do.

[rattlingthestars]

Yeah, I know the feeling.

That does kind of describe half the population around here, though. Me included.

[grimalkid]

So I've seen. I guess experience in this place is more important than actual age in some cases.

@quark; video

[averytinyparticle]

I don't have any parents, either. They left me to die in a junkyard when I was born. My grandpa found and adopted me, but he only did it so I could do work for him. He always yells at me, and the only reason he decided to keep me in the first place was because he couldn't get anyone else to take me.

[Quark sighs, feeling deflated.]

I'm just saying...don't listen to what @betterhalf was saying. I never thought I'd find any friends either but people here are really nice. I'll be your friend. You seem pretty cool to me.

[grimalkid]

[...oh. Oh man. At least his dad handed him over to Mimi.]

...that is horrid of him. Of all of them. [Is this...empathy? Pfft, no way. Shove that emotion down and try to ignore it.]

I have already decided to ignore most of what that person says. Even I know the world is not as harsh as he believes.

[averytinyparticle]

Good.

[As long as Tetsuji isn't that far gone, that's all that Quark can really ask or hope for.]

If you ever get really lonely, you can send me a message. I like talking to people. And I know how hard it can be when you're stuck all by yourself.