howdull: (confusion] explain to me)

[personal profile] howdull 2016-10-11 10:59 pm (UTC)(link)
I am asking.

[That goes completely over his head.]
jumpthegun: (facepalm 1)

[personal profile] jumpthegun 2016-10-12 12:43 am (UTC)(link)
Sherlock, he means for sex. He's making fun of you.

[Please, someone shoot him now.]
pistolproof: don't wanna be (all by my self)

[personal profile] pistolproof 2016-10-12 04:11 am (UTC)(link)
[ John, you are ruining his fun. ]

come now Mate.
jumpthegun: (annoyed | sass 2)

[personal profile] jumpthegun 2016-10-12 05:24 am (UTC)(link)
[Pick someone apart from his oblivious best friend.]

I'd really rather not, if it's all the same to you.

[Well, he can do innuendo, even if Sherlock can't.]
pistolproof: inevitable for a large intellignece and a deep heart (pain and suffering are always)

[personal profile] pistolproof 2016-10-14 01:17 am (UTC)(link)
[ Pick a less oblivious best friend.

Jack's pout becomes an immediate grin at the response. Talk like this, especially in public, was not proper from the time he coms from. Luckily for us, Jack has never been one for propriety.
]

No need to Answer so quickly eh? Weve barely even gotten to Know Each Other.

jumpthegun: (annoyed | sass 4)

[personal profile] jumpthegun 2016-10-14 01:22 am (UTC)(link)
Captain John Watson, Fifth Northumberland Fusiliers. There we are, now we know one another.

[And you know he's military, Mr. Pirate. Former military...]
pistolproof: jack put that apple don't that's rude (what a smug little bastard)

[personal profile] pistolproof 2016-10-14 01:42 am (UTC)(link)
[ Ah. Well, yes. That does put a damper on things. ]

Captain Watson. It be My pleasure.

[ He would absolutely give you a bow if he was there in person but alas. ]

if I didnt any Know better Id Say You have no Inclination to Know me at all. which really isnt Fair Any Way You look at It seeing as You dont even Know My Name.

[ He's hurt. You've hurt his feelings. ]
jumpthegun: (smile | uncertain)

[personal profile] jumpthegun 2016-10-14 01:47 am (UTC)(link)
[Former military who associates with high-functioning sociopath detectives and 1920s London gang lords. At least he's corruptible?]

It's not Sir Francis Drake, is it?
pistolproof: makes all the hearts go doki doki (the jack sparrow trademark smile)

[personal profile] pistolproof 2016-10-14 01:52 am (UTC)(link)
[ He'll make a pirate of you yet. ]

Not as Such. the Names Captain Jack Sparrow.

[ He'll leave it at that. Maybe he's military too? ]
jumpthegun: (annoyed | try again)

[personal profile] jumpthegun 2016-10-14 02:03 am (UTC)(link)
[Jack, absolutely nothing about you says military.]

I'll have you ask you to leave my mate there alone, then, Captain Sparrow--man-to-man now we know each other. He's got interests in bodies, yeah. Not the kind you're thinking of, though.

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howdull: (confusion] asking)

[personal profile] howdull 2016-10-12 02:08 pm (UTC)(link)
[Oh.]

Why would he be propositioning me? We've never met.
jumpthegun: (facepalm 2)

[personal profile] jumpthegun 2016-10-12 07:25 pm (UTC)(link)
Because people are strange sometimes.

[And he's not getting into the issue of necrophilia. No.]
howdull: (deduce] eureka)

[personal profile] howdull 2016-10-13 05:51 pm (UTC)(link)
Have people stopped assuming we're together? That's inconvenient.

[When people assumed they were boyfriends, nobody propositioned him because he was taken. Or less people did.]
jumpthegun: (annoyed | not amused)

[personal profile] jumpthegun 2016-10-13 05:58 pm (UTC)(link)
No. That's accurate.
howdull: (deduce] distraction)

[personal profile] howdull 2016-10-13 06:43 pm (UTC)(link)
It stopped unwanted interest. What have you changed to make people stop believing it?
jumpthegun: (annoyed | not interested)

[personal profile] jumpthegun 2016-10-13 06:49 pm (UTC)(link)
Are you serious? Miraculously, people don't tend to think you're with someone when they aren't around.

[And when he's told them you're dead.]
howdull: (neutral] tea)

[personal profile] howdull 2016-10-13 06:59 pm (UTC)(link)
I'm patently around now.

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pistolproof: jack put that apple don't that's rude (what a smug little bastard)

[personal profile] pistolproof 2016-10-12 04:11 am (UTC)(link)
by all Means. but I assure You there be other Options.

[ Like himself, for instance. Have sex with Jack Sparrow instead of the dead body. He promises he'll be a better lay than a lifeless corpse. ]
howdull: (confusion] explain to me)

[personal profile] howdull 2016-10-12 02:10 pm (UTC)(link)
[What is that typing? Not illiterate, speech to text would capitalise properly, so merely uneducated. Perhaps English second language.]

Not for my purposes there aren't.
pistolproof: if keith richards just saved my life (tbf i'd look exactly the same)

[personal profile] pistolproof 2016-10-14 01:48 am (UTC)(link)
[ Stop trying to dissect his text messages, Sherlock, he's trying to flirt with you here. ]

Im Sure there Could be.
howdull: (deduce] go on)

[personal profile] howdull 2016-10-14 12:08 pm (UTC)(link)
You wish to offer to be dissected while alive?

[No, Jack, there are no other options for what he wants the body for.]
pistolproof: is the the sound of foreshadowing i hear? (oh shit i fell in a grave)

[personal profile] pistolproof 2016-10-14 06:49 pm (UTC)(link)
[ That does not sound ideal. ]

not as Such.
howdull: (confusion] I was wrong?!)

[personal profile] howdull 2016-10-16 10:13 am (UTC)(link)
Then your offer holds no interest for me. Thank you, but no.

[See? He was even polite while rejecting the unwanted advances.]
pistolproof: the fuck else do you need in life? (Default)

[personal profile] pistolproof 2016-10-16 07:31 pm (UTC)(link)
[ He tried to hard and got so far-- ]

Your Los Mate
howdull: (confusion] hmmm)

[personal profile] howdull 2016-10-18 11:38 am (UTC)(link)
18th Century?

[The spelling and the capitalisation finally click into place. Not that he believes anyone here is from the actual 18th Century, but he knows enough now to know that people may believe they are.]

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