[network] @hotstud_xxx; Day 314; audio [open] (cw: there may be graphic discussion of illness)

[rubikscomplex]

[This is Christmas. House's idea of Christmas, anyway. Sudden onset of deadly illnesses with disjointed and impossible progression of symptoms, and him not affected? Christmas! Someone out there loves him. Granted, he might not be able to help anyone get better and that's lame, but answers. Answers are something he is particularly prepared to provide. House is also curious if there's some psychosomatic effect at work here that might let him influence people. He goes on audio for this, and someone sounds almost gleeful.]

Hello, sick people! Dr. House here. I am a board certified medical professional and tenured professor of diagnostics at Princeton-Plainsboro Teaching Hospital in Princeton, New Jersey. I have a double specialty infectious disease and nephrology and head the only Department of Diagnostic Medicine in the world in my universe.

All that said... tell me what ails you, Snowhell. Details required. Pics if you need them. Allow me to diagnose you. This service is free of charge for today only! Or however long this whole thing lasts. I'll even prescribe you meds if they're relevant to your condition. Step right up, then! Don't be shy.

It should go without saying, but I am limited to identification and diagnosis of Earth-based diseases. So if you've got a different name in your universe for the measels, I'm still calling them the measels.

((OOC: While House is an ace diagnostician, I am very much not. It would be helpful for me if you could indicate the disease or diseases your character is suffering from for the event or indicate that the constellation of symptoms was pulled at random/non-Earth-based.))

Comments

[gothamiteknight]

At this point have you thought...that maybe it's you and not them? [Despite House's prank, Bruce doesn't wish him any particularly ill will, but he's just making an observation here, not that he's actually taking Joker's side.] Or do you just...hang out with the wrong crowd?

No...sore throat, no congestion.

[rubikscomplex]

Victim-blaming... nice.

[he's just going to leave it at that. The majority of the hero types he's known here would feel a little bad after having that pointed out to them.]

How about light-sensitivity? It sounds like you have a migraine, honestly. Lots of underlying causes for those. Are you feeling stressed, recently?

[gothamiteknight]

It's only an observation.

[Stressed.]

Other than the fact that I've been brought to a strange world against my will, yeah, I'm really having the time of my life. But obviously you mean back home. Baseline always stressed, been a little more stressed than usual, yes.

[rubikscomplex]

One you share with many a murderer and ex-wife: He had it coming.

What's been getting you stressed, Waynester? Any pre-existing injuries? Conditions?