[network] @hotstud_xxx; Night 112 [text]

[rubikscomplex]

[He needs to do some damage control on his image, not to mention drag his own mind away from the fact that he's done very little in the past few days to stop people doing things that are going to get them killed. So, what better way than being a nuisance?]

good evening and welcome, ladies, gentlemen and goat-things
to snowhell's first edition of the most eligible bachelor
our contestant tonight?
you know him as that guy who rhymes with man-pain
kain!

ladies (or guys)
for tonight only
we're showing an exclusive pic
get a peek under the hood and decide if you want the junk in that trunk

call in now to ask questions about our bachelor
and bid on him
heard someone's got condoms
might wanna keep em handy

[And to go along with this nonsense, there's an attached PNG. kman.png]

Comments

[harlequinofhate]

What about kisses? Kisses are still okay, right?

[rubikscomplex]

dude
how long have you gone without brushing your teeth?
no freaking way

[harlequinofhate]

Hey! I'll have you know I rinse my maw out multiple times a day.

[rubikscomplex]

with what?
drain cleaner?

[harlequinofhate]

ICE WATER!

Not the best stuff for the job but a guy does what he has to to get by, eh?

[rubikscomplex]

ice water doesn't cut it
find some crest and i'll think about it

[harlequinofhate]

I'll keep my peepers open. And, hey, if you see mouthwash stash it somewhere for me, would you?

Gotta keep minty fresh!

[...He may have reasons for wanting mouthwash that have nothing to do with dental hygiene.]

[rubikscomplex]

[House may suspect some of those reasons given how much mouthwash can burn.]

yeah sure
next bottle i find is yours
just don't use it all at once