[network] @ADMIN; Arrival

[snowblindmods]

Welcome to Norfinbury. The time is E̛̬̞͖͖̫R҉͖̯̬R̼̻͉̰͎̳̙O̩͓͔̫͇͈̯R and the date is E̛̬̞͖͖̫R҉͖̯̬R̼̻͉̰͎̳̙O̩͓͔̫͇͈̯R. This network has been provided for your use. Please interact politely with everyone else on this network.

Comments

[jmencalisse]

... Are you serious? [The more answers come in and the more time passes in this really cold house talking to these people the harder it actually gets for David to keep up his own bullshit. Is this an asylum? Is this how nuthouses are run in Alaska? Did the patients overpower the guards and build their own crazy community?]

They hang them upside down from a chain and lower them into a shredder. The Star-Spangled Banner plays on repeat. There's fireworks.

[zunesareawesome]

Oh my God, that's sick! Who are the sponsors for this show? I will never buy their products!

[The fireworks sound fitting though.]

[jmencalisse]

Probably a smart choice. [David has a couple of sponsors lined up but he'd rather work on finding out if Peter is in fact messing with him.]

So who are you?

[zunesareawesome]

[He's betting it's Betty Crocker or Duncan Hines or something.]

Uh--oh! I'm Peter Quill. Star-Lord. Or Sunpaw, if you're interested in joining our very own official cat clan, SnowClan.

[jmencalisse]

[...

Where to even begin.]

So you are a cat? Do you just collect names?

[zunesareawesome]

No. Honorary cat. [Almost just as cool.] Star-Lord is my outlaw name. And Peter is my regular name.

[jmencalisse]

These are very hard for me to pronounce. [They're not.] Maybe I'll have to find a name for you, too.

How does one become an honorary cat, do you lick the inside of your leg?

[zunesareawesome]

Oh. Okay, I mean, sure, if y'like.

[Well, that sounds legit, and he doesn't want to make anyone feel bad if they find it difficult to pronounce the names.]

Dude, no, come on. If you join SnowClan, or like, have a naming ceremony like I did, you can totally get a cool cat name.

[jmencalisse]

Like patte de soleil? What does it mean to join SnowClan?

[zunesareawesome]

Joining SnowClan means food, safety, nests, and protection.

[jmencalisse]

Nests?

Are you chasing birds?

[Why is he even asking.]

[zunesareawesome]

No, nests like...camps. Not bird nests. I've never made a person-sized bird nest.

[jmencalisse]

Then why the fuck do you call them nests? [Look, his English isn't the best and sometimes he doesn't know words but he is pretty sure that is super wrong.]

[zunesareawesome]

Because that's what Blue calls them.

[Try to keep up, bro.]

[jmencalisse]

And Blue is the leader cat? Yes?

[zunesareawesome]

Yep, leader of SnowClan!

[jmencalisse]

Mmh.

I have a question for you.

[zunesareawesome]

Uh, okay. Shoot.

[jmencalisse]

Why are you listening to a cat? What makes a man listen to a cat?