[network] @wiccandoit; video - day 252 [open]

[fanboyascended]

[ Billy appears in the camera's frame looking somewhat grave and holding a black SD card in one hand. Wherever he is, he's been careful to frame it so that there's nothing particularly identifying about his location. ]

If you're paying attention to the publicly available data, you already know this, but - I may've found something related to our mysterious Russians. There was a bunker out here in the residential area with some bodies that probably starved to death. I cleansed it as best I could with salt and made a food offering for the ghosts.

[ Leaving out the part about the toys. It's too sad to talk about. ]

They repaid me with something written in Russian. Any takers for a translation? 'Cause a semester of high school Spanish and like ten words of Hebrew isn't doing it.

[ The video cuts off for a moment before cutting back in, apparently some time later. Billy's wearing an expression that's trying to be cheerful, but it doesn't reach the coldness in his eyes. ]

-Anyway. Maybe we should lighten the mood a little. It'd be nice if there were someone around here that was good at telling jokes, but I guess we'll have to make due, right? Hit me with your best joke. Or your worst one - bad jokes are always a lot funnier.

I'll start: Why did the anomaly spit the clown back out? [ A pause. ] Because he tasted funny.

Comments

@hotstud_xxx; text; private

[rubikscomplex]

oh, you're cute, kid
leave the clown alone if you know what's good for you
and just look for more clues

if you find anything else in russian
let me know
i can try talking to the data ghosts in their mother tongue
unless you can speak russian fluently

[And considering he seems to have gotten a translation, maybe.]

[fanboyascended]

Can't do that. Not when he's taken out at least one Avenger. Hunting him down doesn't work. Keeping him captive doesn't work. Getting him to develop a fixation and then staying one step ahead might.

I don't speak Russian, unfortunately. I could head back to that bunker in a few days, see if we could get a conversation going.

@ASolomons; audio

[devoutish]

House speaks it.

[And so does Alfie, but he'd learned it at home from his mother, who had never had reason to teach him the alphabet. As a foreigner who'd learned it to a high level of fluency, he'd be surprised of House hadn't picked up reading and writing too.]

audio;

[fanboyascended]

Hey, Alfie.

Not going to help me out, then?

action

[whiteknightnecromancer]

As soon as Billy stopped recording Dorian made a point of rolling his eyes and groaning in ostentatious disgust. "That was terrible. Please tell me you can do better than that."

No one must learn Dorian's secret. He thinks puns like that are adorable. It kind of shows in the edges of his mouth.

[fanboyascended]

"Snow telling how bad my jokes can get," Billy says, deadpan. He can't help himself. "Don't tell me you're going to freeze me out over it."

@user; voice

[cosmicwords]

So the spirits do acknowledge our attempts to help...

Has anyone helped you translate, yet? If not, I may be of assistance.... My Russian is a bit rusty but, still....

voice

[fanboyascended]

They do. According to Stephanie, this isn't the first time. I think we just have to learn what it is they need and give it to them.

Someone provided a translation. I can pass it on if you want.

@gravedigger; voice

[harlequinofhate]

Oof.

Why don'tcha leave the comedy to the professionals, kiddo?

>audio

[fanboyascended]

Let me know if you run into one.

@betterhalf; audio

[darkincrement]

[ The joke is stupid, but he figures out the game pretty quickly. Especially since with the Joker responding.

So he's going to actually respond with a laugh. ]

Good one. What do you call a clown who's in jail?

audio;

[fanboyascended]

[ score from weirdo key guy. ]

A silicon!

What material do you use to make a clown suit?

@gravedigger; voice

[harlequinofhate]

You people need an education in good humor.

audio; @dreamsnhonor

[heroproceeding]

[ More dead bodies, huh. Well, that's comforting- as in not at all. But it's pretty... routine? At this point. In some really fucked up way. He doesn't really get the whole cleansing with the salt thing, but it sounds like some respectful ceremony, and it apparently gave them a clue, so he'll take it as a good thing.

Scoring some brownie points over here, Billy.

The stupid joke? Even better. ]

That was so bad, man. And for the record, I can't say I speak Russian, so I can't really help you there if you need it in the future. Looks like you already got that covered though. Huh.. Didn't know he spoke Russian..

audio

[fanboyascended]

Made you laugh, though, didn't it?

@Kid, video, evening 252

[equal_shots]

I hope you also properly paid your respects to the dead.

[Kid is less interested in bad puns, but he's going to humor you.]

My weapon partner Patti is particularly fond of knock-knock jokes.

[fanboyascended]

As best I know how.

[ He doesn't exactly have the means to hold a funeral. ]

Lay 'em on me.

@totheark; text

[0thingsonmymind]

sa lt
?

>text

[fanboyascended]

For ritual cleansing. Traditionally it's used to absorb bad energies and sweep them away.

I was trying to get rid of whatever bad ju-ju's blanketing the whole town.

@Spoiler ; audio

[spoileralert]

I've got a translation app! I can transfer it to you, if you want.

Also: the correct answer is "because literally nobody likes clowns".

>audio

[fanboyascended]

Minimalist. I like it.

I got a translation from House, but what languages can that thing handle?

@bucky; text

[advanced]

I can see you already got translation. If you need more, I can help.

[He's trying to be useful and not keep himself closed off, and Russian is definitely in his wheelhouse.]

>text

[fanboyascended]

-Thanks. I appreciate it.

[ Even as he's staring at his tablet in surprise. He really hadn't expected to hear from Bucky of his own volition again. ]

@Ecks | text

[ecks]

I know a joke

[Davesprite seemed to really enjoy this joke, too!]

one time there was a cow
but the cow fucked a skeleton

>text

[fanboyascended]

Well that escalated quickly.

@beyonce | audio

[thewarningafter]

That was terrible, Billy.

[It came back to him this morning -- all of it. Like the last time, he's celebrating by calling everyone by name.]

You get any sense that it helped? Other than the SD card, which I guess is a sign itself.

>audio

[fanboyascended]

Everyone's a critic.

The SD card was the only sign. Food and toys stayed where I left them. No change in atmosphere. Just the card.