[network] @Mnemosyne; video; night 227; history will judge us [open]

[bookofnope]

[Beckett starts the feed sitting huddled in a corner against a wall that's been burned a featureless black. He's not wearing his tinted glasses, and both his look and voice are flatly composed, distant.]

I am going to start recording everything. Simply leave this thing on at all times. We are losing too much information to patchy and inaccurate records in a way that is simply inexcusable considering the means we have access to. I strongly recommend that you all do the same. [He pauses, then nods half to himself.] If nothing else then for those who will come after us. Eventually.

[So optimistic, Beckett.]

Do let me know if you would like to receive regular transmissions of my records. And if you have, and are willing to use the means to put some of them on SD cards that may be preserved in the event of lost access to our iteration of the network. There is... a certain comfort in the thought of posterity, in my experience. Such as it is.

[Such as it is. He wrinkles his nose at the thought, and puts the tablet aside, though the recording keeps running. After a bit of time, he picks it up again and adds a text message, along with an attached file: TheBookOfNod.txt]

The file I am attaching is the complete text of the Book of Nod: the mytho-historic principle document of the Cainites, namely, the vampires of my world, transcribed from memory. I doubt this is of particular interest to anyone, but my physical copy was recently destroyed, and as far as I am aware, that was the last copy in existence. My purpose here is thus its preservation as a text. I am the last record of my Kindred. Let something remain.



[OOC: I didn't want to directly link one but if anyone's interested for whatever reason it's actually really easy to google up an online copy of Vampire the Masquerade's Book of Nod. I'm sorry it's so painfully 90s.]

Comments

[bookofnope]

Crudely, yes. There is a complex linguistic-philosophical heritage... but in essence, it is about the struggle between human cognition and control, and the pure id of the vampiric inner demon. I use inner demon in the literal sense, mind. [He snorts faintly.] Not in the sense of our deprived childhoods.

[mrcreamsicles]

Literal.

[Okay. And not even touching the other remark.]

What's it feel like having a literal inner demon trying to guide you around? I'm going to guess a smidge different than what my programming tells me to do.

[If Beckett's imbued with a drive to be helpful yet cryptic, he will eat his beautiful sunhat.]

[bookofnope]

For the most part? It feels like being hungry.

[His voice drops, an odd meditative tone. The kind that, along with his distant eyes, show that he isn't entirely talking to Davesprite here.]

Always hungry. Like there is a dark pit inside of you that is never really filled. When you are sated, as sated as you can be, you glow; you feel life pulse inside of you, all the brighter for being stolen. But when you hunger you know nothing but. The hunger breeds rage, and the wish - the need to throw off everything in you that stands between it and its pleasure. You fight it, because otherwise you will cease to be human. But at the same time, the cessation is tempting. Without your humanity, perhaps at last you would be able to feed your fill.

[mrcreamsicles]

... Guess that explains why you're on that list in the guide.

[Does he sound awkward? Because he has no idea how to put it in a non-awkward way.]

If I just go and wish you good luck dealing with that it's going to sound trite as shit. I can't even imagine that kind of thing, not in any real way. How... how do you deal with it?

[bookofnope]

[He offers a tired shrug, deflated. Once the moment is broken it's as though he wasn't talking about demonic urges just two seconds ago.]

There's no secret to it. You simply do. You find a purpose, or a code that you adhere to, and it lets you keep functioning as a sentient being. Many vampires spend their entire unlives fighting their own nature.

[mrcreamsicles]

All I can say is this is making me real glad I'm not a vampire. I got enough to deal with just being half-crow.

[Which honestly isn't that bad. He likes his wings. Wings don't try to make him abandon his humanity and drain people like a kid with a box of Capri Sun pouches all to himself.]

How long have you been one?

[bookofnope]

Are you actually half-crow? Does it have any mental implications?

[Genuinely curious, see. He may briefly be peering at Davesprite like a naturalist at an intriguing new specimen.]

I was turned some three hundred years ago. Which is - was enough to be considered an elder, but I've met enough true ancients to give me some perspective.

[mrcreamsicles]

[Davesprite's neck ruff fluffs, and he caws for Beckett, like an actual crow call.]

Yep. Sprites are made when you stick stuff in this thing called a kernel, and Jade stuck the crow in before I hopped in myself.

[Which is drastically simplifying the whole story.]

I've been this way a little over three years now, so like a hundredth of your time as a blood-sucking grandpa. It's got some stuff, like instincts at the back of my mind, but nothing real pressing. If I want to ignore it I just do.

[bookofnope]

An ordinary Earth crow? [Though that begs the question of where, well, the rest of Davesprite came from.] Is it anything like the process by which Jade became, how does she put it, notdog?

[Or maybe that's Brian's terminology. But he's sure Davesprite gets it.]

[mrcreamsicles]

I have never once heard Jade call herself notdog. She's absolutely part dog now. But yeah, though she had some extra steps, which is why she has legs and isn't another hue of technicolor eyesore.

And yep, totally normal Earth crow.

[bookofnope]

Not a bad creature to be mixed with, altogether. Very intelligent. Uniquely social, for a bird. Plenty of exciting mythological and literary allusions... can get away with murder.

[Look sometimes puns make him feel better.]

[mrcreamsicles]

I'd need partners to pull it off.

[And he can deadpan right along with it.]

[bookofnope]

And you are the only specimen... so I suppose that's nevermore of that.

[This is happening.]

[mrcreamsicles]

I know, man. They say birds of a feather flock together, but I'm just a Poe boy on my own.