[Log] An apple a day keeps the doctor away [closed]

[exequies]

Characters: Bucky Barnes, John Watson, Steve Rogers, and Undertaker (walk into a bar...)
Location: Building 131 (the hospital)
Date: Day 208, midday
Summary: Undertaker revives at the hospital after being dead for several days. He's found by both Bucky and John. Also I suck at summaries.
Warnings: Suicidal ideation and mentions of suicide.

131: The roof of a large, square hospital. At first, it seems like this is as far as you can go--but actually, there's a door on the rooftop. It's locked, but there's a card key reader attached. As for what spared it from having its parts stripped? It was frozen over with ice, though not any longer. The building can now be entered from the rooftop.

The hospital is eerie in its silence, and snow presses in against many of the windows, keeping much of it in sterile darkness. It still smells like a hospital; the antiseptic is fresh, and there isn't much dust. Someone must be cleaning it, and yet it's clear no one is here. The hospital is four stories high with one basement, all connected via the elevator lobby and staircase. Unfortunately, the wall of the elevator lobby has been torn open all the way down, exposing it to the bitter air outside. While you can explore and remain on most of the floors of the hospital at night, you cannot travel between them until it's daytime once more, as the lobby seals itself up at curfew.

The first floor has both more and less relaxed areas. There's an operating room down here, too, as well as another sort of laboratory, and a large section of this floor is taken up by labor delivery. The hospital has a generally oppressive atmosphere, but this area is marginally less so. Only marginally, though. The rooms in the delivery wing are larger than the rooms upstairs, with a more private atmosphere, but there are extra beds in here, and even VIP delivery isn't private on first blush. A closer inspection reveals the rooms only really seem fit for one of the beds. Others must have been added later for some reason. The lobby is very large here, with plenty of seating available for waiting. There's a door that works, also, opening to the south into a small, empty parking garage and finally revealing the rest of the ice tunnel area. During the day, at least. It's locked at night like everything else. There are finger-sized slits cut into many of the mattresses. One of the bathrooms on the first floor has signs of a fire having been set, with scorch marks. "ALPHONSE ELRIC, DAY ONE HUNDRED AND SIXTY TWO, CONTACT @LELRIC FOR ANY ASSISTANCE" is written on the wall. "ALFIE SOLOMONS, 1922. Camden Town, London, England, UK, Europe, Earth. Day 165, February 24." is carved into the wall. Underneath the RECEPTION sign is the following, scrawled in black crayon:
"NⓍ NIMA
where is it?
73 74 69 6c 6c 20 73 65 61 72 63 68 20 69 6e 67"

Comments

[advanced]

[He's trapped.

It's not going to be hard for Steve to hunt him down because the floor isn't that big and he's unsuccessfully trying to get through one of the doors and making a lot of noise in the process.

He's desperate, punching at the thick door viciously in an attempt to get it to come free of the jamb and let him into the stairwell, but all that he's achieving is bloodying his knuckles.]

[fiteme]

[Well... yeah, even disoriented and dizzy, Steve can hear the noise and he follows it. He watches Bucky from a ways back in the corridor for a moment, his own hand pressed to his forehead to try to counteract the pain.

He leans against the wall, suddenly very tired of all of this, and very worried about Bucky, but not daring to go any closer.]

Bucky, please stop. You're hurting yourself.

[He says it quietly, and doesn't even know if Bucky will hear.

Huh, he's having trouble standing, that's weird. Oh well. He'll just sit on the floor.]

Why do you wanna get away from me so bad, huh?

[advanced]

[Steve's voice hits him like a solid punch, knocking all the air out of his lungs, and it does effectively freeze him in his efforts to get out. He can't. He's trapped in here, the second time that Norfinbury's hilarious sense of humour has trapped him overnight with Steve Rogers.

But at least the other one had known what to expect, this Steve? He's too young, he has no idea what a mess is going to become of their lives, and he still thinks that he is Bucky. Really Bucky.

He stays facing away, voice low.]

I'm not who you think I am.

[fiteme]

You've said as much.

[Steve sighs. He's really not sure how to proceed here, especially with a head that's fuzzy (and probably concussed, he realizes), but he has to try.]

Okay. So then tell me who you are.

[advanced]

I don't know, I'm still trying to figure that out for myself.

[He finally turns, brow furrowing slightly in surprise when he sees that Steve is sat rather than stood.]

[fiteme]

Alright.

[He takes a deep breath, reminding himself that getting angry at what was done to Bucky is no help here, so it has to be saved for another time. Besides, he doesn't have the energy for it.]

Can I help?

[advanced]

[Now that he's turned to look, he can't take his eyes off Steve, intense and a little desperate.]

You have to stay away from me, I'm just trying to keep you safe.

[fiteme]

Why? I've... [He stops himself from saying I've never been safer than when I'm with you because it isn't strictly true and it's referring to the person Bucky claims isn't him. He just sighs instead.]

Why do you think you're so dangerous to me?

[advanced]

I'm dangerous to everyone.

[Pierce more than proved that he can still be triggered, and the creeping dread in his mind from this place puts him on a hair trigger in most situations.]

[fiteme]

[This is definitely a frustrating conversation, and part of Steve knows he should be climbing up a wall with it, but the concussion is leaving him tired and generally fuzzy and it's like there's just no room for concentrating on the talk and emoting about it at the same time.

If it weren't for the headache it might even be a good thing.]

What makes you dangerous?

[advanced]

[That's a question that would take too long to answer, so he instead just shakes his head slightly.]

It's not important. What matters is that I don't want to be the one to hurt you.

[It's why he's avoiding Steve and not really anyone else, despite being dangerous to everyone. Nobody else matters in quite the way that Steve does.]

[fiteme]

It's important if you think it means you're going to hurt me.

[He doesn't want Bucky to hurt him either, but he can't very well protect himself if he doesn't know exactly what he's protecting himself from except his... well. The man who used to be his best friend.]

[advanced]

[His frown deepens, but more in thought than anger. He can't really argue with that logic, though it digs deep under his skin to even think about discussing this.]

Because I'm strong, and I can't always tell who's a friend and who's not. If you move the way, or said the wrong thing, I might hurt you.

[fiteme]

[Steve takes a deep breath and does his best to think about that clearly. Yeah, it rankles that Bucky doesn't seem to trust that Steve can take care of himself, but that's not the argument right now.

Well, maybes it is, but only a little bit.]

You could tell I was a friend even when you couldn't remember me at all.

[advanced]

[He blinks in obvious surprise, he never thought about it like that before.]

Maybe, but I've hurt people I consider friends anyway.

[He's sure of that.]

[fiteme]

[Steve pretty mich has to think things through carefully right now, which hurts a lot, and he's tired, but it means he's not running his mouth, which is for the best.]

But maybe... if I was around you more often, you might have a harder time forgetting and trying to hurt me. And I could remind you who your friends are so you don't hurt them.

[advanced]

[All of that makes logical sense, but it doesn't help to quell the paranoid whispers at the back of his head that convince him that he'll hurt Steve. Look at him, he's so small, so skinny, how could he defend himself if it became necessary?]

You couldn't fight me off.

[fiteme]

[Steve bristles. He wants to shoot back "well how do you know that?" But he remembers that wouldn't help at all right now and he takes a deep breath and calms down. Logic. Think about this logically.

God, he's so tired.]

So we'll figure something out. If you start trying to hurt people, and me, maybe... I'll run. Or we can figure out something for me to say that will help you remember I'm your friend and you don't have to hurt me.

But Bucky, we don't know for sure that you'll try at all. And you're not... you're not going to figure yourself out if you isolate yourself. I can help. Or... well, I can try, anyway. If you'll let me.

[advanced]

[He turns properly towards Steve now, not even half away looking for an escape route, and spreads his fingers placatingly. It's probably only now that it becomes obvious that he only has one arm, the other sleeve hanging loose all the way down from the shoulder.]

If I'm on my own then I can't hurt anybody. That's the most important thing, I don't want to-- I never want to hurt anyone again, but I keep doing it anyway.

[fiteme]

[God, he didn't know about the arm, he had no idea, and Steve stares at it a moment, a flood of worry and anger rushing through him before he squeezes his eyes shut and reminds himself to focus. He can ask about the arm later.]

You hurt yourself by being alone, is the thing. Please. At least... let me try, for a little while. We can travel together just a few days, and if it doesn't work out, you can leave again.

[advanced]

[It's such a bad idea, he can't trust himself at all. But something about Steve's earnest eyes and a tugging memory of the friendship they used to have stops him from just immediately saying no.]

Three days.

[Is that the wrong decision?]

If I even try and hurt you before that, it's done.

[fiteme]

Deal.

[He won't celebrate, not when this could very well end horribly, but Steve is glad Bucky agreed regardless.

He struggles to his feet, which is a lot harder than it should be, but he makes it. Even if he's swaying a little once he's there.]

So which direction do you want to go?

[As if they're leaving right now. Jeez, Steve, hold your horses.]

[advanced]

It's lockdown, we can't go anywhere until morning.

[But he finally notices the swaying, and he steps close enough to almost hesitantly lay his remaining hand on Steve's shoulder.]

You're hurt. Where?

[fiteme]

[Well, yeah, but planning stuff out ahead of time would be a good idea...

But Bucky's asking about how he's hurt, and Steve tries to wave it off.]

Just hit my head on a door. I'm fine.

[He's not.]

[advanced]

Show me.

[It's a demand rather than a request, and if Steve doesn't acquiesce then Bucky will move to try and take hold of him and move him around so that he can see.]

Dizzy? Nauseous?