snowblindrpg | [network] @beyonce | video | day 207 | I'd Rather Go Blind [open] [cw cognitive impairment]

[It's midday when Stephen appears on the network, eyes rimmed red from crying, the vaulted ceiling of the chapel visible behind him. It's ridiculous to feel betrayed, as though there had ever been any reason to trust in the healing powers of a system of resurrection he doesn't even understand, but the shock of waking up in a body bag has been chased by grief and anger.

That's not why he's posting an open video to the network, though. Stephen's first thought had been to send a quick message to his traveling companion to let her know he's ~~alright~~ back and arrange a place to meet, but that plan had gone down the toilet the moment he'd opened up the network and realized he didn't recognize any of the names. That's ~~deeply disturbing~~ inconvenient, but there's an obvious solution -- he'll just have to identify people by sight instead of by name for a few days. It's fine. It's not real brain damage, it's something to do with the way the revival system works, so it's fine.

He offers the camera a fairly convincing smile, though his voice is a little raw.]

So the good news is that I'm alive. I'm not quite sure where I am, though, and I'm guessing I need to get out of here sooner rather than later if I'm going to make shelter. Anyone recognize this place?

[He lifts and turns the tablet, giving the camera a look at the altar. It's a lie, of course; he's already looked this place up on Nat's guide. He just wants to see some faces, get back in contact.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Yesterday?

[ She blinks. ]

That was quick.

You okay?

Yeah. Yeah, I'm fine.

[No, he's not. His hands are still fucked and he doesn't know who he's talking to.]

I think I must have lost some memories, because I don't know -- I haven't noticed anything else.

[It's a good story, it'll work until he can verify. Two people isn't enough, he needs more faces, needs to --

-- needs to go back and look at recent messages on the network. He's bound to recognize someone from them.]

Listen, I need to check on something. Thanks for letting me know where I am.

Is there anything I can do to help?

No, it's -- it's fine.

[He gives her a tight smile before disconnecting. If she replies it'll be a few minutes before he responds again, but he'll eventually come back around to this post once he's confirmed his ~~fears~~ suspicions.]

Okay. Just, you know, open offer. If you need anything.

[She didn't know he had died, so she isn't his traveling companion. She recognized the chapel, so she's probably not a recent arrival. That still leaves it wide open, and without being able to assign a name to anyone in his mind it's hard to separate out all the people she might be. He tries comparing usernames to see what else she's posted to the network, but as soon as he stops comparing the names side by side he forgets what name he's looking for. Stubbornness carries him through, though, and he's finally able to confirm a match with her post of a few days ago and can add information gatherer to the list of clues. He knows two of those, and he more or less trusts both of them.

Stephen reappears after some minutes.]

Actually, you could probably help me out. Do we...know each other?

[He'd better be right to trust her.]

[ She blinks at him. ]

Um, we've talked a few times. You don't remember?

I can't tell if I remember you, I just don't recognize you. What have we talked about?

[ She frowns. But he's not asking her name, so she doesn't offer it. ]

Superhero names. I told you people might be upset if you started keeping tabs on who everyone was and where they all came from. I showed you some of the raw data I've collected.

[He's attentive, comparing it to what he remembers -- and suddenly, his expression clears.]

You said my opinion didn't count.

[He's incredibly relieved to be able to make that connection.]

[ uHHHHHH ]

I... was joking about that, you know.

Well, yeah.

[Duh, of course his opinion counts.]

I can remember you saying it, though. That's the important part.

And you know who I am. Good.

Yeah. Yeah, it's good.

[This is the first good news he's had since waking up. It's a bit pitiful how glad he is that he still knows who the people around him are even if he doesn't recognize them just now.]

I don't recognize you, though. I don't recognize anyone. I'd say prosopagnosia, but the names are gone, too.

Prosopagnosia. [ The word isn't immediately familiar, so she commits it to memory. ] Is that the loss of ability to recognize faces?

Whatever it's called, it's not good. Has anyone else figure it out, do you think?

[He nods distractedly. He's been running through the diagnoses, discarding each.]

It's not consistent with known patterns of cognitive impairment.

[He says so to reassure himself, mostly. It's not real brain damage. He's not going to live with whatever bizarre agnosia the system's visited on him forever.]

I don't think anyone else has picked up on it yet. I don't think I have any enemies to worry about, either, but I'd rather not advertise this.

If I told you the usernames of people to avoid, would you be able to remember them?

I doubt it. I tried to look you up and I couldn't retain your username when I wasn't looking at it...but if you give me a list I can compare it to incoming messages.

Perfect.

[ She rubs her temple. ]

Just, until this passes, don't agree to meet with anyone. Don't give out any sensitive information. Definitely don't tell anyone where you're headed.

Yeah, I kind of figured.

[Again, duh.]

I've been able to figure two people out so far. I'm still waiting to hear from the person I was traveling with.

I don't know who you were travelling with, or I would help. The last time I saw you you were-- [ following House, more or less. But that won't make sense to him. ]

After the whole Vicodin snaffu.

It was a nurse. Someone from my world.

[Might not ring any bells for her, but it's reassuring to tell himself he's not entirely clueless about who's who.]

Oh! There's only one nurse, Claire. I can call her for you if you want.

Yeah? Yeah, that'd be good. Thanks.

No prob, back in a sec.

[ AND OFF SHE GOES ]

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[network] @beyonce | video | day 207 | I'd Rather Go Blind [open] [cw cognitive impairment]

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