snowblindrpg | [network] @beyonce | video | day 207 | I'd Rather Go Blind [open] [cw cognitive impairment]

[It's midday when Stephen appears on the network, eyes rimmed red from crying, the vaulted ceiling of the chapel visible behind him. It's ridiculous to feel betrayed, as though there had ever been any reason to trust in the healing powers of a system of resurrection he doesn't even understand, but the shock of waking up in a body bag has been chased by grief and anger.

That's not why he's posting an open video to the network, though. Stephen's first thought had been to send a quick message to his traveling companion to let her know he's ~~alright~~ back and arrange a place to meet, but that plan had gone down the toilet the moment he'd opened up the network and realized he didn't recognize any of the names. That's ~~deeply disturbing~~ inconvenient, but there's an obvious solution -- he'll just have to identify people by sight instead of by name for a few days. It's fine. It's not real brain damage, it's something to do with the way the revival system works, so it's fine.

He offers the camera a fairly convincing smile, though his voice is a little raw.]

So the good news is that I'm alive. I'm not quite sure where I am, though, and I'm guessing I need to get out of here sooner rather than later if I'm going to make shelter. Anyone recognize this place?

[He lifts and turns the tablet, giving the camera a look at the altar. It's a lie, of course; he's already looked this place up on Nat's guide. He just wants to see some faces, get back in contact.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[He's attentive, comparing it to what he remembers -- and suddenly, his expression clears.]

You said my opinion didn't count.

[He's incredibly relieved to be able to make that connection.]

[ uHHHHHH ]

I... was joking about that, you know.

Well, yeah.

[Duh, of course his opinion counts.]

I can remember you saying it, though. That's the important part.

And you know who I am. Good.

Yeah. Yeah, it's good.

[This is the first good news he's had since waking up. It's a bit pitiful how glad he is that he still knows who the people around him are even if he doesn't recognize them just now.]

I don't recognize you, though. I don't recognize anyone. I'd say prosopagnosia, but the names are gone, too.

Prosopagnosia. [ The word isn't immediately familiar, so she commits it to memory. ] Is that the loss of ability to recognize faces?

Whatever it's called, it's not good. Has anyone else figure it out, do you think?

[He nods distractedly. He's been running through the diagnoses, discarding each.]

It's not consistent with known patterns of cognitive impairment.

[He says so to reassure himself, mostly. It's not real brain damage. He's not going to live with whatever bizarre agnosia the system's visited on him forever.]

I don't think anyone else has picked up on it yet. I don't think I have any enemies to worry about, either, but I'd rather not advertise this.

If I told you the usernames of people to avoid, would you be able to remember them?

I doubt it. I tried to look you up and I couldn't retain your username when I wasn't looking at it...but if you give me a list I can compare it to incoming messages.

Perfect.

[ She rubs her temple. ]

Just, until this passes, don't agree to meet with anyone. Don't give out any sensitive information. Definitely don't tell anyone where you're headed.

Yeah, I kind of figured.

[Again, duh.]

I've been able to figure two people out so far. I'm still waiting to hear from the person I was traveling with.

I don't know who you were travelling with, or I would help. The last time I saw you you were-- [ following House, more or less. But that won't make sense to him. ]

After the whole Vicodin snaffu.

It was a nurse. Someone from my world.

[Might not ring any bells for her, but it's reassuring to tell himself he's not entirely clueless about who's who.]

Oh! There's only one nurse, Claire. I can call her for you if you want.

Yeah? Yeah, that'd be good. Thanks.

No prob, back in a sec.

[ AND OFF SHE GOES ]

Thanks.

[He spends a few moments clicking through other messages, pinning down an identity or two. None of the names are sticking even once he's attached them to memories.]

I probably need to get going soon.

Yeah, okay. [ She frowns. ]

She hasn't gotten back to me yet. I'll let you know if I don't hear from her tomorrow.

Thanks. I'm going to go ahead and copy your username down; I should be able to get back in contact with you if I don't hear from her.

Cool, yeah, that should work.

[He pauses, brief but awkward.]

Really, though. Thank you.

[And he'll sign off unless she has more to say to him.]

[network] @beyonce | video | day 207 | I'd Rather Go Blind [open] [cw cognitive impairment]

private;

private;

private;

private;

private;

private;

private;

private;

private;

private;

private;

private;

private;

private;

private;

private;

private;

private;

private;

private;

private;