[network] @Iwillnot; What's a cat to do [open] Day 156

[absentconstellation]

[ Audio ]

[ The Cat has regained his tablet, packed his bag with as much food as it would fit and holed himself up in the house accessible only by a dog house. It seemed appropriate. Now he's assessing what to do next, and as much as it pains him to admit, he needs some advice on that. ]

Where might a particularly small individual do the most good?

Comments

[rubikscomplex]

[If he hangs up first, is that the cat winning? Probably. He's not hanging up, asshole.]

why were you even hiding any of this
you're a cat
it's useful to know
what did they even put in your pack for food?
fancy feast?

[absentconstellation]

[ He yawns. ]

You two-leggers are such touchy creatures.

[rubikscomplex]

says the guy in the shape of a creature renown for randomly freaking out at literally nothing

[absentconstellation]

We are quite skilled at enjoying ourselves.

[rubikscomplex]

some of us are good at that, too
you wanted to know where to go?
checkout downtown or the entrance
see if you can find a way over the walls with those cute kitty claws of yours
or maybe we can turn you into a literal catapult

[absentconstellation]

I will not waste this body on any foolish suicide missions.

[rubikscomplex]

"this body" will come back
probably
you're useless if you're not willing to take risks
sometimes those risks are suicidal
you're literally the only intelligent person we have so far who can get into the vents
there's a shaft in the post office that leads something like 500 feet down
presumably to the underground where the admin and miller are

if we get another maintenance period
the spiders aren't there
get there
figure out how to get down safely
and go

barring that
check out the vet
the kids have had better luck searching the school
maybe you'll have better luck searching there

alternatively
go to the hospital and meet up with lockhart
she has an app that's all about cats
you being there might have some influence on what she finds

[absentconstellation]

[ Whatever bro he still feels pain, and making a new body for himself is exhausting. ]

What is an "app"?

[rubikscomplex]

a program for the tablet you're using
different apps have different functions
some people have a map app that lets them map things as they go along
there's a data app on your tablet that lets you access community data from the sd cards we've found

[absentconstellation]

[ He will try to absorb as much of this as he can, but he doesn't like being too dependent on someone for information who is so well known for playing games. ]

I shall see if I have any effect on Tifa's tablet.

[rubikscomplex]

[Very occasionally, he's not playing games.]

let us know what you find
there's also the cat lady's house
and jia xu's house
she was the one the program lockheart's using came from
her house, anyway

check romanov's guide for those

[absentconstellation]

I will see what is closest. If I cannot affect one it is unlikely that I can affect the others.

[ Efficiency! Or laziness. Both? ]

[rubikscomplex]

[Laziness.]

what you can affect is highly variable
don't dismiss any possibility

[absentconstellation]

It is my understanding that we have very limited time available in which to escape this place.

[rubikscomplex]

you won't go in the vents
and we have yet to find anywhere else more useful for you
you've got time, d.c.

[absentconstellation]

I have been informed of several locations which may be easier for a cat to search than a human, even a young one.

[rubikscomplex]

where?

[He is actually curious, not being dismissive.]

[absentconstellation]

A play structure for children, the dark places in the hospital. I have negotiated an acceptable deal to explore the vents with the man with the metal arm.

[rubikscomplex]

if they're talking about the northern parks
the play structure has dead bodies piled up under the snow
you okay with that?
not sure what "dark places" there are in the hospital that they're talking about
but if you're already heading that way for lockhart, good
and the guy with the metal arm isn't someone you should trust, btw

[absentconstellation]

You are a healer. I imagine you have seen scores of the dead. I have seen many thousands of times more than that.

[ It's a constellation thing. ]

Why should I not trust him?

[ He doesn't actually care about your opinion, but he is interested in its origins. ]

[rubikscomplex]

do you have to do that?
the "i'm an immortal being of knowledge and experience far more vast than your own" thing
you realize it's incredibly cliche?

and you shouldn't trust anyone
we're all desperate to get out of here
and you just look like a cat
easier on the conscience if someone murders you for the cause

[absentconstellation]

If you do not wish to hear cliches then you should not ask questions to which you already know the answer.

[ He is also super paternalistic, so enjoy that, House. ]

It would certainly not be the first time.

[rubikscomplex]

[Go away, Star Catdad. He already has Batdad and his paternalism to deal with.]

so how many times have you died?
please tell me it's less than nine
please, please

[absentconstellation]

Far more, I'm afraid.

[ He doesn't keep count. ]

[rubikscomplex]

do you have an upper limit?
9 million?