[log] THE BLIND LEADING THE BLIND [closed]

[armoured]

Characters: Alphonse, Zach, and Church
Location Building 242 (day 153/154) and 241 (day 155)
Date: Day 153 (evening) and all of day 154, and morning of 155
Summary: Al meets up with Church and the two run into Zach
Warnings: Possible talk of death

[He got away again.

Al feels that failure as a wound that cuts far more deeply than any injury he's sustained. This is the third time that he's had the Joker in his grasp and lost him, the third time he's been injured and left behind. He gave chase at first, but he has no idea which direction the Joker even went, so he ends up just trudging through the snow trying not to let his injuries get the best of him.

He's almost glad when the police station seems empty at first glance. He doesn't want to meet up with anyone and see their concern when they see what happened, or hear their disappointment when they learn what happened. He's just so tired of failing everyone around him.

It's not the end. He'll pick himself up and force himself to keep moving, to find that core of determination the next day. But just for tonight he'll sit and wallow alone.]

Comments

[majorlazer]

[There's someone. There's someone, Zach can hear noises and a voice and holy shit, someone's here and maybe Zach's not going to die all over again because he can't see and he was about to venture out on his own and hope for the best, keeping in touch with Steph and Kes and letting them try to help him.

But he's not alone. Relief floods through him and it makes his knees weak, dropping to the floor at the top of the stairs, a hand on the wall, the other over his face. Al's here. Al is here. Zach lets out a choked out sob before trying his best to compose himself.]

Al? Al, I'm here - I don't know, I can't - I can't see. [His voice is weaker than he'd like.]

[armoured]

[It doesn't take Al long to locate Zach and he carefully takes him by the elbow to make sure he doesn't fall back down the stairs or anything as crazy as that.]

--it's okay, you're alright, I've got you.

[Can't see isn't fun, but he knows enough by now from everyone who has been through these things that it's likely not permanent.]

[majorlazer]

[Feeling Al's metal arm under his hand is surprisingly reassuring. Zach clings a little, swallowing hard.]

Where are we?

[He sways a little, trying to regulate his breathing.]

Thank you, just - thank you. I thought I was alone. I thought I was - I don't have any food, Steph kept my backpack, we'd just gone through the cafeteria at the school and we needed to get the food to the tunnels and - [He stops, jaw clenching as the memory of the ceiling falling down on him crashes upon him.]

[armoured]

[At least Zach doesn't flinch from his touch, so he assumes Steph has at least warned Zach that Al always wears a suit of armour. He's sure she won't have told him more than that, he trusts her with his secrets.]

I know, she told me.

[His voice is deliberately calming and gentle.]

Come on, hold onto me and I'll take you to sit down, we can talk then.

[majorlazer]

[He remembers from their conversation, the whole metal body thing, since Al showed himself on camera then. He remembers Steph telling him about it. He remembers thinking it's cool.

Zach follows Al along, no idea where they are, no idea what it looks like, what he looks like. He's still struggling to breathe.]

I just need to know where we are, so I can - get going. I need to get my stuff back. I need to get - [my girl, he thinks, closing his eyes to it, not that it matters anyway.] - Steph back.

[armoured]

Don't be an idiot.

[He isn't going to coddle Zach just because he's temporarily blind, being an idiot is still being an idiot.]

Do you think Steph wants you to go running off when you can't see or anything? She'd want you to take care of yourself.

[majorlazer]

And what, sitting around doing nothing is taking care of myself?

[Zach's not really in the mood to be condescended to - even if it's with the best reasons in the world.]

I've got no food and no gear. She's planning on meeting me, but I'm not staying here - wherever here is with my thumbs up my ass. That's not going to help, is it?

[He doesn't mean to snap at Al. He just honestly doesn't know what taking care of himself means, for Al.]

[armoured]

Did I say you had to sit here doing nothing? I said running off like this was stupid, and it is, all you'll end up doing is getting yourself hurt again. You said it yourself, you don't have any supplies of food or anything, you don't know where you are, and you can't see.

[Strong metal hands press on Zach's shoulders in an attempt to make him sit down.]

Taking care of yourself would be asking Steph where she is, and then letting me guide you there so you can share my food. Don't be so quick to run off alone. Idiot.

[majorlazer]

I don't want to run off, I just need to - do something. [His voice is plaintive, pained. The feeling of being out of control is making his head spin and his hands shake. He just - wants some control. Needs some control. Having a plan would help that.]

You know where we are. Where are we? [Seriously, he's asked that like, three times. He sits down, to appease Al. Whatever.

He ignores most of what Al's saying. He might be right, and he might want to help, but Zach is scrambling, right now, to keep his sanity. He can hear Al, and feel him and his touch, but being unable to see is...it's fucking him up. It's really fucking him up.]

I know where Steph is. She's near the school, still, been trying to catch up with Kesara.

[armoured]

We're down in the new area to the south, past the aquarium, in a police station.

[He's not about to let Zach go wandering off alone, and if he tries to then Al will pin him down and sit on him.]

You can't do anything right now anyway, nobody can travel at the moment. The whole place is surrounded by fog, we're stuck inside.

[majorlazer]

Shit. [Zach had hoped he'd be somewhere close to Steph, only a couple days' travel. But the new area...that feels far. Zach deflates, slumping on his chair a bit, one hand scratching at the back of the other, feeling the burn of it after a while.]

Okay. But as soon as we can, we leave, yeah? [He's open that, despite not being able to see anything, his eyes are conveying just how important this is to him. He needs Steph back. He needs Kesara back. He's going to tip over otherwise.] You can lead if that's what you really want, I'm not forcing you if you have shit to do here, but I need to go back north.

[armoured]

You really think I want Steph to kick my ass for letting you go alone?

[He snorts, trying to get Zach to calm down a little. The situation is horrible, the whole thing is traumatic, but there's nothing they can do about it but try and move on.]

Besides, I-- I finished what I came down here to do.

[He didn't. He failed again.]

[majorlazer]

[Zach joins in on the snorting. He can imagine that if she knew Al was around and left Zach to his own devices, she would...not be best pleased.

He doesn't mention the new deal he and Steph struck. That doesn't seem like something Al should know, or would want to know about, anyway.]

Fair enough. And you know, she - she misses you a lot. She'd like to see you.

[armoured]

I miss her too.

[His voice shakes just the tiniest bit before he gets it under control. He can't afford to focus on his own issues right now, not when Zach needs him.]

So we're going to get back to her together, but I need you to not be a idiot, okay?

[majorlazer]

[Zach holds his hands up in the air, wide open.] What do you expect me to do? Run off in the snow while I can't even see?

[He shakes his head. Sure, he's not smart, but come on. He has to stay alive. He made a deal.]

Look, I know I'm not like, the brightest crayon in the box. But I'm also not suicidal. I'm just - impatient, and I thought you wanted me to just sit here and wait to be rescued, at first. I'm fine with going together.

[armoured]

Okay, good.

[He's not going to apologise for calling Zach an idiot, because he kind of was acting like one and he calls it as he sees it.]

Have you called Steph yet? She's going to need to know you're alright.

[majorlazer]

Yes, it, I - [Why is it so hard to say?] It's kinda the first thing I did. After I got over the, the initial shock, I guess.

[Suddenly, wildly, he wonders if there's blood all over his clothes.]

Am I bloody? Am I? Like - it was - [He swallows thickly.] It was bloody.

[armoured]

Hey--! Hey, breathe, you're okay. There's no blood, I promise, you're...

[Fine. He can't say fine, not when Zach is clearly not fine.]

...clean.

[Wow. That was a bad response.]

[majorlazer]

[Zach runs his hands down his coat, his jeans, expecting them all the feel sticky with blood, expecting his chest to still be burst open, Alien style, but he's in one piece, he's in one, solid piece. And his hair doesn't feel as grungy as before, and his jeans don't feel as dirty. Like they gave him a shower and his clothes a wash.

It's not exactly a comforting feeling.]

I'm - I'm I - man, it's so much harder to compute this time around. I died once, and I just. I picked myself up, kept going. I don't know why I can't - think straight.

[armoured]

Death isn't something anyone should just 'get over'.

[Nor come back from. He doesn't say it, but the implication hangs loudly between them.]

It's okay to be scared and hurting, you just can't let it drag you under.

[majorlazer]

Yeah, well. [He thinks it too, Al. He thinks it too. He's glad that people come back, around here - it means Steph came back, it means he came back. But it doesn't make it natural. It doesn't make it right.]

I'm not, I'm not, I've got - plans, I'm not - it's just hard. It keeps on coming and going. [It's just pure terror.]

[armoured]

Why don't you tell me about your plans? It'll give you something else to focus on.

[Not only that, but it should remind him of all the reasons why he has to stay strong and carry on.]

[majorlazer]

[Zach takes a breath, rubbing the heels of his palms against his eyes for a moment.]

One, meet back up with Steph, somewhere north of here, south of the school, I think. Two, hot shower house - not for me, for her and her clothes because - [because she's probably still very bloody and neither of them need that reminder.] because it'd just be best. Three, meet up with Kesara, make sure she's okay, and fed, and safe. Four, go to the museum. Keep digging.

[Zach tilts his head in what he thinks is approximately Al's own face.] What are your plans?

[armoured]

Good, those are some good plans with some solid ideas, so you have to make sure you stay strong and keep going long enough to achieve them.

[He squeezes one of Zach's shoulders gently, comfortingly.]

As for me--

[He falters for a second. He's failed at all his plans recently and it gets to him deeply.]

--I'm going to keep doing everything I can to make sure everyone here stays safe, no matter what it takes.

[majorlazer]

I'm not - [Strong, he wants to say. Brave. Any of these things. He was brave for about five minutes, back home, when the world needed him and little kids bullied him into it by being so fucking earnest about it. He wasn't brave when he pushed Steph out of the way. It was selfish, more than anything else, his desire for her to stay alive.

He shakes his head, dropping it to rest his chin against his chest.] Nevermind. Yeah. Gotta stick with it, it'll be fine.

[There's something in Al's voice, something like regret, maybe.]

You wanna stay with Steph and me, later?