[log] mmm whatcha say [closed]

[powersouls]

Characters: Zack, Tifa, Zell, Kunsel, and... Jim? Kind of?
Location: House 43
Date: Day 72
Summary: Jim tries to take out a monster and fails miserably.
Warnings: Death, violence, grief? You know, Snowhell stuff.

Comments

[powersouls]

[Tifa is exhausted, but she thinks she's finally cried herself out, and the initial anger and fear has been replaced by a sick sense of grief. She's helpless, here as she was in Nibelheim, and even their increased vigilance after Cloud and Hiro's deaths apparently haven't been enough.

So what are they supposed to do? How are they supposed to keep this from happening again?

The only plan she really has, at the moment, is to check up on Kunsel. He'd saved her today, after all. If he hadn't reacted so quickly, she's not certain she would have stopped herself in time. And she knows she hadn't exactly reacted gratefully, so she feels like she owes him an apology at the very least.

It doesn't take her long to find him, but when she does, she hesitates in the doorway, not sure if her presence is wanted or not. Maybe he just wants to be alone, but it's worth a shot.]

Hey, Kunsel?

[deus_ex_phs]

[Kunsel had talked to Zack already, but that doesn't necessarily mean he's feeling much better. You can't lose a companion, watch them die right in front of you, and just... get over it. But at least Kunsel isn't just staring at the floor anymore. He'd pulled his tablet out and was scrolling halfheartedly through recent posts when Tifa came in the room.

When she speaks, though, he looks up soon enough.]

Hm?

[Sorry, Tifa. You have his attention, but he can't quite muster much more than that.]

[powersouls]

[Okay. That sounds... sort of welcoming. Not dismissive, at least. It doesn't surprise her that he's on his tablet, although she's not sure if checking the network is somehow comforting for him, or if he's using it as a distraction, or both.

For her part, Tifa still doesn't enter the room right away. Instead, she toys with one of her earrings for a moment, trying to make sure she's got herself under control first. No crying. She can't do that to him.

Then, finally, she approaches, although she doesn't sit down beside him just yet.]

Um... Can I talk to you?

[deus_ex_phs]

["Both" is a good guess, Tifa. It's a habit, a routine, something familiar, even though the technology itself isn't the same. It gives him something else to think about, and that? All of that helps. Bonus points that it keeps him caught up on things that are happening in other parts of the town.

But even so, he lowers the tablet at Tifa's request. He's never been that much of a network junkie that he'd just ignore a friend.

...even if he has a feeling that she wants to talk about something that still hurts, no matter that he's talked over it with Zack.]

Sure. What's up?

[powersouls]

[She finally settles down beside him, using the movement as an excuse not to answer right away. She's still trying to gather her thoughts, to figure out where to start, even though she's already been overthinking this downstairs.]

I just wanted to thank you for... earlier today. For stopping me.

[She doesn't think she would have been able to stop herself, even if it had been obvious that it was hopeless.]

[deus_ex_phs]

[Kunsel tries for a smile, but his heart's nowhere near in it. He gives up on it all too soon.]

I wouldn't be much of a SOLDIER if I stood back and let someone die. Not when there was something I could do.

[powersouls]

[Tifa disagrees with that statement. She's completely of the mind that any good member of SOLDIER is the exception, not the rule, but she also knows this is absolutely not the time for that conversation. She forces a little smile of her own in response, although it disappears as quickly as his.]

Right. Well... I appreciate you looking out for me.

[deus_ex_phs]

[One of these days Tifa will voice her thoughts and opinions out loud. When that day comes, Kunsel will probably have some things to say, but...

Well, that day is not today.]

You're welcome. But I'm sure you'd do the same.

[powersouls]

[She nods, glancing down for a moment. It's true that she would, but she's still grateful to Kunsel nevertheless. And worried, of course.]

How are you doing?

[deus_ex_phs]

[Kunsel doesn't answer right away. That's really not the kind of question that's easy to give an honest answer to - not without making it obvious that it's a lie. Instead, he pulls his knees up to his chest, staring at something only he can see.]

I... I'll be okay.

[No, he's not fine. Not even claiming to be. But eventually...

His voice lowers, somber and still filled with pain.]

I've lost friends before. I know how to deal with it.

[powersouls]

[Well, she's sure they've all lost friends before. She's experienced it, but it never gets easier. Even if Kunsel does know how to deal with it, she can't imagine it ever gets any easier for him, either. There's nothing good to say to him in response, so she risks leaning her shoulder into his, very slightly.]

It's still hard, though, isn't it?

[deus_ex_phs]

[Kunsel's quiet for a moment. Just a moment to get his emotions under control, a moment to make sure his voice stays at least somewhat level. Maybe a moment to appreciate the comfort she's trying to give.

After that moment, he presses his shoulder into hers.]

...yeah.

[There's not much more that he can say than that. Not so soon.

But for now, just sitting like this is enough.]