[network] @librarian; Evening 309; video/text [open]

[cahooted]

[Flynn would actually prefer to keep this text only but his disdain for touchscreen applications and his love for talking out loud get in the way, as per usual.]

So I hope everybody is doing okay, in a more or less okayish manner or some variety thereof. We had a bit of a difficult time lately with the memory twists and confusion and, you know, usual side dish of general horribleness going around. I'm just gonna assume that the demand for distraction is high and I am happy to announce that there have been some new additions to the library, especially our somewhat scarce fiction section.

Hello to all our newcomers, too. You have already received the important guides and information at this point, I'm sure. For those of you I haven't had a chance to speak with yet, my name is Flynn Carsen and I'd like to add some of the more leisure-oriented material to your reading list – but please, put a particular emphasis on your immediate survival, thank you.

As you will soon realize the evenings after lockdown can get long and tedious and there is not much going around in terms of entertainment, so: There is a joint effort to compile an e-library of reading material people have found during their travels or have brought with them into the city.

[He switches to text at this point, if only for convenience's sake.]

You can access the current collection here.

Among our newest additions are:

• A story about a seagull. Very post-modern, very disjointed symbolism. For fans of Ulysses, House of Leaves and Dadaism, not necessarily in that order.
• A novel about two rivals, seeking the fountain of youth to claim immortality and infamy. Predictable but fun.
• A story about a haunted house coming alive. Might hit a little close to home in this deathtrap of a city but the writing's of decent quality. Don't read when you're traveling alone.
• A bunch of manuscripts from an unknown Norfinbury author. Particularly happy about this one. There's even some screenplays in the mix. Some are already up, more will be added over the next couple of days.
• A billiard magazine. Lots of pictures. A little depressing, the rooms are very nice. Good for a cry if you miss spacious lounges, velvet couches, scotch tumblers or being rich.

I'm also happy to announce an original tale by our very own Hans Christian Andersen about a [cannibalistic animal murder mystery] badger.

As per usual, stay safe and warm and and try not to die.

Comments

[quadrangle]

[Sigh.]

DO YOU WANT ME TO BREAK DOWN THE REST OR ARE YOU GOOD? BECAUSE IF YOU'RE NOT GOING TO GET IT ANYWAY AND LALONDE IS TAKING OVER, I'M PRETTY MUCH DONE HERE.
I TOLD YOU IT WAS COMPLICATED. THIS IS WHY I USUALLY JUST STICK TO EXPLAINING SHIT ABOUT TROLLS INSTEAD OF GODDAMN TIME TRAVEL AND PARADOXES AND FUCKING GENESIS FROGS.

[cahooted]

Genesis fr--

[He bites down on his lip, unsure if he wants to open up another can of potential confusing weirdness worms. Or frogs.]

Hey, I'm trying, okay? [It's really not his fault your world is so weird, Karkat??] But yeah, sounds, uh, very complicated.

[quadrangle]

I GET THAT, YES.
SO DO YOU WANT ME TO KEEP GOING OR ARE WE DONE HERE?

[cahooted]

[...]

Okay, I'll bite. What are Genesis Frogs?

[quadrangle]

[... Nngh. You can't see him, but he's rubbing his forehead.]

UNIVERSES.
I MEAN THAT EACH ONE IS LITERALLY A WHOLE UNIVERSE. PART OF PLAYING AND BEATING THE GAME INVOLVES BREEDING A NEW GENESIS FROG WITH A VERY SPECIFIC GENETIC SEQUENCE.
YES I KNOW IT SOUNDS ABSURD. TRY ACTUALLY LIVING IT.

[cahooted]

You're breeding a universe. That is also a frog.

[He regrets asking. Just a little.]

Oookay.

[quadrangle]

YES. MY TEAM MADE THE UNIVERSE THAT GREW TO CONTAIN A PLANET KNOWN AS EARTH, UPON WHICH A SPECIES KNOWN AS HUMANS *SOMEHOW* BECAME THE DOMINANT SENTIENT SPECIES. I WAS AS SURPRISED BY THIS AS I AM SURE YOU ARE ABOUT EVERYTHING I'VE JUST TOLD YOU.

[cahooted]

You... bred our universe? Wow, I think now I've just heard about every origin story out there. Do you have followers? Are the humans in your world all "hail the universe frog" and bring offerings to you?

Do you have a church?

[Asking the important questions.]

[quadrangle]

[Flynn, why.]

HOLY FUCK. YES, NO, NO, AND NO. SHIT GOT COMPLICATED, SO WE WERE CUT OFF FROM EVER ENTERING THAT UNIVERSE. AND SGRUB ISN'T EXACTLY COMMON KNOWLEDGE, SO NO ONE KNEW ABOUT THE FROG.

[cahooted]

[Sorry, Karkat. His curiosity is endless and all of this is weirdly fascinating in its absurdity. He can probably keep this up all day.]

Interesting. Any particular reason why it's a frog?

[quadrangle]

IT'S BECAUSE FUCK YOU. FUCK YOU IS WHY.
LOOK I DIDN'T MAKE THE GAME, THE GAME MADE ITSELF. OR SOME OTHER UNKNOWN ENTITY DID OR SOME ITERATION OF WHATEVER THE FUCK, I DON'T KNOW! FROGS IS JUST WHAT IT TURNED OUT TO BE, END OF STORY.
LALONDE ALREADY TOLD YOU THIS, THERE'S JUST SOME SHIT WE DON'T KNOW AND THAT'S HOW IT IS. AND NOT ALL OF US WERE INCLINED TO DIG INTO WHAT SYMBOLIC RESONANCE A GIANT FUCKING PONDSQUATTER WAS SUPPOSED TO HAVE WITH REALITY AS A WHOLE. IT JUST HAPPENED.

[cahooted]

[Okay, rude. And so very uncalled for. Really, he shows a deep interest and appreciat-- interest in your world, Karkat, and that is how you repay him?]

Is this a bad subject? Because I'm beginning to feel like this is a bad subject all of a sudden, I don't know why. What a strange inkling.

[But fine, he'll just leave it at that. No more potentially stupid questions, clearly Karkat feels very strongly about this.]

... What if you don't play?

[Look, he tried. This is him trying.]

[quadrangle]

[HOW IS THIS WHAT HE'S HEARING RIGHT NOW]

HOW ABOUT *YOU* GIVE EXPLAINING THE NATURE OF ALL EXISTENCE A SHOT? I DON'T FUCKING KNOW, DO YOU THINK YOU MIGHT HAVE A FEW PROBLEMS DELVING INTO SHIT YOU BARELY UNDERSTAND TO BEGIN WITH?
I MEAN YEAH IT HAPPENED TO ME BUT MAYBE TRY HOLDING YOUR HOOFBEASTS AND OR POSSIBLY CONSIDERING THAT YES, THIS JUST *MIGHT* BE A BAD SUBJECT FOR A VARIETY OF REASONS.

[Case in fucking point—]

AND YOU'D END UP WITH A DOOMED TIMELINE, THAT'S WHAT. AS IN, A TIMELINE IN WHICH EVERYTHING EVENTUALLY FUCKING COLLAPSES IN ON ITSELF BECAUSE IT WASN'T HOW THINGS WERE "SUPPOSED" TO GO.

[cahooted]

[Man, this guy really is angry all the time.]

Well, you could have just said so.

[Quick, what could he say to placate him?] Uh. Glad your timeline didn't collapse?

[quadrangle]

[Flynn can't be blamed. Flynn really, really can't be blamed for this, but—]

YEAH, MAYBE DON'T MAKE ANY ASSUMPTIONS ABOUT THAT EITHER AND ALSO NEVER BRING IT UP AGAIN. WITH ANY OF US. *EVER.*

[cahooted]

[Okay. He has no idea what's going on but even he can differentiate between a bad subject and– whatever this is.]

I'm sorry. I won't.

[quadrangle]

[Y e a h, there's bad topics and then there's fucking catastrophic ones. Just. Doomed timelines. No.]

OK. THANK YOU.

[Deep breath.]

DO YOU HAVE ANY SIMPLER QUESTIONS OR ARE WE DONE HERE.

[cahooted]

I could probably come up with some but I feel like my foot is wedged quite deep into the mouth already.

[At least he's self-aware?]

Let's, um, how about we call it a day.

[quadrangle]

THAT WOULD BE ACCEPTABLE, YES.
AND INDEED YOUR STRUT POD IS LODGED AS FAR DOWN YOUR PROTEIN CHUTE AS IS PHYSICALLY POSSIBLE WITHOUT YOU BEING ABLE TO STRETCH THAT EXTRA INCH AND KICK YOUR OWN ASS. BARELY.
BUT WHATEVER, I'M OUT. LATER, DOUCHEBAG.

[cahooted]

[Well.

He probably deserved that one. It doesn't stop Flynn from bristling but it's more on the embarrassed than agitated side today.]

Right. Later, troll.