[network] @ADMIN; Arrival

[snowblindmods]

Welcome to Norfinbury. The time is E̛̬̞͖͖̫R҉͖̯̬R̼̻͉̰͎̳̙O̩͓͔̫͇͈̯R and the date is E̛̬̞͖͖̫R҉͖̯̬R̼̻͉̰͎̳̙O̩͓͔̫͇͈̯R. This network has been provided for your use. Please interact politely with everyone else on this network.

Comments

@ASolomons; text

[devoutish]

BROKERAGE SERVICES & UNREGULATED TRADE
For the purpose of organization and efficiency

@Spoiler ; video

[spoileralert]

Stephanie Brown here. [ She smiles. It's a distracted, tired smile. It isn't very good. ]

You've been kidnapped and brought to a town in Alaska called Norfinbury, year 2150-something, or something like that. Time travel, alternate universes, maybe magic, who knows what all shenanigans are involved.

I'm happy to answer any questions you might have, but I've also linked some useful resources. I suggest giving the Survival Guide a read, because there are some pretty unique dangers to this place you'll need to know about.

[ Attached:
SurvivalGuide.doc
Map.gif
Infodump.doc
OtherResources.doc ]

@mjolnir; video

[thepulverizer]

[ Marie is forcing a smile in return. It isn't much better. ] Thanks for the help, Stephanie. I'll be sure to look it over.

[ She sighs. ] I never expected that being kidnapped would come with supplemental reading, but I appreciate your hard work.

@dissect; audio; private

[circumsutus]

[No.]

There's a lot of supplemental reading. [Stein sounds as exhausted and stressed as he feels, but the overwhelming sharp... panic (that's panic, panic cutting into his soul, he should not be panicked but he's still in the process of relearning emotional reactions since Watson's surgery) at the familiar face on the screen.]

Have you found the maps yet, Marie? What's your location?

[thepulverizer]

[ She's so glad to hear his voice. It sounds like he's in rough shape, yes, but he sounds lucid.

There are a few things she needs to do: assess the truth of the situation, work with Stein to reunite, determine if there are any other DWMA personnel or their students here... ]

You know how maps feel about me! [ Or that. She can do that. ]

private continues forever

[circumsutus]

[Thankfully, he can handle lucid for now.

But he knows about Marie's tumultious relationship with the concept of basic directions. Oh, he knows.]

I just need you to figure out where you are right now. Are there any messages in the building? Can you see any distinguishing features in the landscape around you?

private forever yes whoops

[thepulverizer]

[ Right, yes, time to focus. ] I'm in a one-story home, one of those little A-frames with a loft. No messages. Outside looks like it may have been a war-zone. There are a lot of heavily damaged buildings, but I've got line of sight of a steep bank of snow.

I could try walking alongside it until I hit something that'll be a better landmark.

@Kid, text

[equal_shots]

[Yeah so in an attempt at not sounding or proving, immediately, that he's probably dying from MN poisoning, Kid is going to be using voice to text. Sorry Marie!]


miss Marie
you should read the guides
they will give you a lot of good information but it can be overwhelming
please make sure you are inside before seven
you have until eight but if you wait until the cutoff you run the risk of being locked out

[There's a delay, and then:]
on second thought maybe you should not travel alone
even i remember from when i was little finding you lost around the academy
where are you

[thepulverizer]

[ The sheer wrongness of the formatting is jarring, but the tone is right. She's the adult here. She's got to be in control, be reassuring, and not have a total panic meltdown. ]

Let's tackle this one thing at a time, alright? You don't have to worry about me, I'll be fine.

How are you hanging in there? Are you dressed warmly? I've got good gloves if you need them. [ She's not actually so optimistic as to think cold hands would excuse sloppiness from Kid, but she wants to. ]

[equal_shots]

you are a death scythe and still get lost in the academy
it is perfectly appropriate to worry
i am dressed well enough and indoors
now where are you
if we are to do things one thing at a time
this is the thing i want to start with

[Basically, giving Kid the opportunity to dodge questions by using text means that he's going to continue being a stubborn teenager until she gives him what he wants or catches him in the act. Good luck!]

[thepulverizer]

I'm safe and I'm working on it. Now- [ Be the adult. Be the teacher. Don't get pushed around by the son of god. ] It's my job to watch out for you, so you're going to tell me how you're doing.

video

[spoileralert]

I'm happy to help. My understanding is most kidnappings include someone barking orders at their captive and telling them they'll be fine if they behave and if whoever-it-is pays the ransom.

You know Kid?

[thepulverizer]

He's one of my students. Ah, geez, I should introduce myself, huh? [ A little wave. ] I'm Marie Mjolnir, an instructor at the DWMA.

[spoileralert]

DWMA? Something-or-other Academy, I assume?

Kid doesn't talk about home much.

[thepulverizer]

The Death Weapon Meisters Academy. [ And she says it as if that is a perfectly normal name. ] Kid can be reserved, but he's a good- well, he's a good kid. Are you a friend of his?

@hotstud_xxx; text

[rubikscomplex]

oh, god
not another one of you people
are you a basket case, too?

[thepulverizer]

I'm a hammer, but thanks for the warm welcome.

@featherydouche; text

[mrcreamsicles]

trust me there is a fuckton of reading if you want to catch up on everything
its hella dense and time consuming but it does pass the time if youre ever bored and curious
or just want to know more about whats going on
that said i can explain some of the important bits if youve got questions
steph is still helpful and good to know but i know its all a lot to absorb on the first day
btw im davesprite

[thepulverizer]

The more the merrier, right? It sounds like we're all in this together, so I appreciate the offer.

whoops accidentally missed this

[mrcreamsicles]

merrier aint the word id pick
you would think merry would be right at home here in this hellacious winter wonderland
snowy enough that santas workshop ought to be just around the corner
except all youre going to find is ruins and a scattering of buildings still safe to stay in
even the elves here got dick all to do with any kind of winter holiday gift crafting scheme
though one of them did get all judgmental at me about the kind of knight i am
but i severely doubt the naughty or nice list depends on some stuffy tools opinion of how my sword ought to get used
but yeah we more or less have to rely on each other
there wouldnt be half the resources steph linked if not for multiple people working together and contributing what they find out

@gravedigger, voice

[harlequinofhate]

The survival guide is a load of hooey.

Anything that mentions moi without going into my fabulous sense of style can't be very thorough.

[Cough.]

voice

[spoileralert]

You're a clown, by definition you have no style.

voice;

[harlequinofhate]

No, sweetie, by definition I'm an entertainer.

voice;

[spoileralert]

No one has ever thought clowns were entertaining. They are unilaterally the worst.

voice;

[harlequinofhate]

We are, aren't we?

But of all clowns I am the best at being the worst.

[He'll just choose to interpret "worst" as "worst nightmare."]