[network] @309_W1C_2DZ; text;an analysis of board games; night of 226 [open] cw: mention of drug use

[howdull]

[Sherlock hasn't really been talking to John and Mary the past few days, not since the whole monster fiasco that led to them getting separated and then finding one another again. It's sort of become an unspoken agreement just to keep moving towards the trap door.

But the endless moving, the waiting, the sleeping in houses that are locked down, is boring. And Sherlock Holmes does not do well with being bored. He's been restless all evening, pacing through the little house they've taken shelter in, taking his violin out only to tune it fretfully and then replace it without playing it, perhaps indulging in one or two of his remaining tablets to take the edge off (John and Mary don't need to know), and finally emptying his backpack to reorganise his supplies. Which leads him to noticing the murder mystery board game he collected some time ago and didn't pay much attention to.

The more he reads the rules, the more annoyed he gets, finally turning on the tablet to type a furious article. It would be something he published to the Science of Deduction, but he doesn't have access to his website here. So it gets published to the open network. Sorry, everyone.]

An analysis of the true perpetrator, and why the rules are pointless distractions, in Spyglass: A murder mystery game for all the family

On the surface, Spyglass appears to be a simplistic game intended for parents to push at their children to gain them an hour of uninterrupted peace, little more than a distraction for the dull-witted with minimal thought placed into execution or design. Digging further into the game sadly reinforces that initial impression, for it not only displays poor design choices, it actively teaches children to ignore blatant evidence and rely solely on guesswork for the solution to a crime.

As some of these children will undoubtably be the police officers and detectives of our future, it's hardly a surprise that our law enforcement agencies are in such dire straits when this is likely the first building blocks for their eduction in deductive reasoning. The players are taught to rely only on deducing which cards have not been played, rather than to look at the overwhelming truth staring them in the face.

The victim and the perpetrator are the same person.

Let us examine the evidence as we are intended to do, in the role of detective called after the 'murder' has taken place. We are presented with an array of weaponry - a gun, a knife, a candlestick, a rope, a wrench, and a lead pipe - of which we can easily rule out three immediately. A gun, a knife, and a rope, all leave distinctive wounds that would be impossible to conceal. As there is an element of mystery, and we, as detectives, apparently do not know which weapon caused the fatal blow, we can eliminate those from the pool of potential weapons. This means that the victim must have been killed by blunt force trauma, inflicted by the candlestick, the lead pipe, or the wrench.

Now we must look at the suspects and location of the crime. Each of the suspects, and the victim, are named for a colour. While it is not impossible for such surnames to exist, it is so unlikely as to be beyond reasonable doubt, that so many people with such surnames would all come together on the same night, with no anomalies to be found. No Mr. Jones alongside Mrs. Peacock, only Colonel Mustard, and Miss Scarlet. The inference that can be taken from this naming scheme is that, fairly obviously, these are pseudonyms. There are several reasons why all guests at a party might choose to hide their identities and, while not all of them are illegal, most are seen as at least socially immoral or scandalous. Thus, it can be further inferred that those present would be nervous of anyone discovering their attendance at such an event.

When combined with the location, a large house with a sealed cellar and several secret passages between rooms, the likelihood of this being a criminal enterprise grows exponentially. Very few houses require secret compartments or passages, unless they are to be used for hiding illegal wares, drugs, or trafficked humans. It is, however, impossible to determine the nature of the criminal activity without actual analysis of the scene, and so we must content ourselves with merely knowing it was criminal.

This is where we receive our concrete evidence that this is not a murder. Seven criminal cohorts, who have evidently been working together for some time based on the secured location and coordinated pseudonyms, would not commit a pre-meditated murder and allow themselves to be caught so easily. The body would be disposed of, along with the murder weapon, and all parties would remain silent on their involvement. A crime of passion is, by its nature, not a particularly subtle affair, and evidence of it would have been noted by the other members of the party. They would then have either assisted in a cover-up, or have turned on the clumsy murderer to protect themselves. None of these situations came to pass.

It is most likely that Mr. Black suffered an unfortunate accident, a fall which resulted in a head trauma from a nearby cabinet or step. The witnesses could all attest this being an accident, but fear to be found for, with their criminal backgrounds, would most likely have records which would positively identify them and could lead to an arrest. Thus, they flee, leaving the blundering police force to assume the worst - a suspicious death with many suspects. Unable to look past the surface of the scene, blood, and many potential weapons uncovered; they pick a suspect, a location, and a weapon at random in order to 'solve' the case.

In conclusion, this seemingly innocent attempt to arrest the attention of malleable minds, is truthfully a crime against the development of true deductive reasoning.

-- Sherlock Holmes

Comments

@Ecks | text

[ecks]

I don't understand
if it is a card game who are these people
why are there weapons
where did this happen?

[howdull]

[There's a long suffering pause, before Ecks gets a photograph of the box, along with the cards and pieces all laid out.]

It's a board game, there are several pieces and cards that denote the suspects and weaponry.

[ecks]

[She will interpret that pause to be due to the need to go take a picture. She studies the image with great interest.]

the cards are representational
it is a story or a word puzzle except with cards
that is a very interesting idea!

Text | @Summoner

[ninjainviolet]

[ Why is she doing this? ]

Aren't you making a few false assumptions about the weapons?

[howdull]

Such as?

[ninjainviolet]

That the gun, knife, and rope would be used as intended. The other three items aren't, so why should they?

[ She's going to be giving hints as to her former profession now. ]

action;

[jumpthegun]

[John's been giving both of his friends space after the most recent bouts of trauma, but this? This is Sherlock in a fit of boredom, grasping for anything as a distraction. The doctor sighs and heads off to find him.]

You really need to get over being terrible at Cluedo, you know?

[howdull]

[He's sitting amidst most of his possessions, pupils slightly dilated, flicking the pieces around the board in irritation.]

It's not Cluedo, John, it's Spyglass.

[It's literally the same thing with a different name.]

[jumpthegun]

[John notes the dilated pupils. He's looking for them these days more than he used to. It's only a moment before the doctor is kneeling next to the other man and pressing his fingers and against Sherlock's neck to check his pulse.]

What did you take, and how much?

@starspangledhero; voice

[fifty]

I think you're taking Clue way too seriously, dude.

text;

[howdull]

Should we not take the foundation education of our future law enforcement officers seriously?

[fifty]

It's not like that's the only thing they'd ever learn about being a police officer or detective or whatever.

@standardissue; text

[deus_ex_phs]

But did the rest of the criminals flee?

Or has the murderer struck again and done a better job of disposing of their bodies?

[howdull]

Don't be ridiculous.

[Like Sherlock isn't the one being ridiculous here.]

Disposing of six bodies perfectly, and leaving a seventh completely in the open? Highly unlikely.

[deus_ex_phs]

[Hey, Kunsel is treating this with all the seriousness it deserves.]

What if the seventh was the first, though. What if the killer learned from his or her mistakes?

The others were witnesses. He couldn't risk what they might reveal to the police, even unintentionally.

@gravedigger; audio

[harlequinofhate]

Did you just blame a game for the cops of today being so lousy at their jobs?

[howdull]

One of a multitude of reasons.

@featherydouche; text

[mrcreamsicles]

didnt ever think i could see a guy so bored hed write a whole analytical diatribe about clue
or spyglass i guess
what is it with this place slapping up transparent copies of other things around
cant even get a board game without calling it something weird
spyglass
like why spyglass
what does a tiny telescope have to do with murder mysteries

[howdull]

Nothing.

Likely it was chosen for containing the word 'spy' which, while it also does not have any relevance to the game in question, likely sounds suitably 'exciting' to appeal to the target demographic.

@jphawkins, text

[rattlingthestars]

Wow.

You are really bored.

[howdull]

How could anyone be otherwise in this interminably dull town?

@hotstud_xxx; text

[rubikscomplex]

analyze monopoly next
and share whatever you're on
it's apparently good stuff

[howdull]

Why would I bother to analyse such a straight forward game as Monopoly?

[He hates Monopoly, he always loses.]

Action. This is action

[agravating]

[Mary isn't a fan of the hours of lockdown, trapped behind locked doors until the sun rises again. Nor has she been a fan of everyone's uncomfortable mood. But this? This is a bit too much for her to pass up.]

A bit tired of reading the network, Sherlock? [Shifting in her seat, she props her chin on her hand.] I can think of better things to do than rattle off a thesis on Cluedo.

cw: drugs

[howdull]

[He glances sideways at her, clearly high by the size of his pupils even if he hides it well in other areas.]

It's a perfectly legitimate topic, don't you find it interesting?

[BETRAYAL! This is exactly the sort of quality content he always writes when he has nothing better to do.]