Furious. But the first thing I did was try to prove to them that I do have value. On my terms, not theirs.

Then dad was killed, and I just... lost it. I remembered him teaching me to ride a bike, and trying to decorate cakes for my birthdays. All the times he drove me to the hospital because I'd fallen trying to do some stunt.

I guess... [ She hasn't spent a lot of time thinking about this, actually. She's been trying to avoid it. ]

I guess, when he died, it meant that things between us could never get better. I'll never be able to ask him if he really loved me. And if he didn't, I'll never be able to hurt him like he hurt me.