I'm such a burden. I hate being alone, but I hate feeling like nobody trusts me to be alone without getting hurt. But, like, every time I've been alone lately something bad has happened. Like breaking my arm. Not like that's the worst thing. I'm bringing bad things to everyone else. Like, totally everyone.

I keep wondering if it's my fault that Clayton and Charlie are gone. Cause I was dating both of them...and they both died. They're both probably never coming back. And Steve, I really liked him, the first one, and he's gone. I just want to be with someone. It's so pathetic. Like I'm not really worth much unless I'm sleeping with someone. I know I shouldn't talk about myself that way but it feels more true every day. I want to be useful but really I'm just a bimbo. And one that brings bad luck to all the people I care about.

I can't do anything to help.