[network] @Spoiler; SURVEY Day 002 08:00 [open]

[spoileralert]

[ Video ]

[ Steph flashes the camera a smile - she's starving and horribly cold, so it isn't as friendly as it might have been. It fades quickly. She keeps her eyes on the camera, as one accustomed to video phones. ]

Hi. I'm Stephanie, and no, I don't know how we got here, where we are or why we're here. I'm working on those last two, though. So in that interest, I have two requests. The first is that you answer a survey: nothing somebody who kidnapped you wouldn't already know or be able to find out easily. So far I haven't seen that we have much in common with each other. For that matter, it seems like we might not have, like, planets or time periods in common. [ She grimaces apologetically. ] Which is weird, so feel free to take your time with that one.

The second is this: Try to map your location. These are all going to be disconnected for a while, but given time they might come together. There's a program on your tablet that lets you draw pictures - use that. Let's assume that the sun rises in the east and north is up. Uh... if you don't usually have a north that's left-east up-north right-west and down-south. Make a note if you run into someone, and list what you find. That includes those massive snow walls people have been talking about.

On that note, a third thing: don't go wandering out into the snow if you're not sure you'll be able to get someplace warmer before nightfall. People get lost in snow easily, and tend to go a little crazy if they get cold enough. I don't know what last night was about, but it's insane to wander out in the snow at night if you don't have the right gear or know where you're going.

[ Finally she takes a breath and lets it out in a long sigh. She managed to sound pretty professional for a terrified, starving, seventeen year old girl. ]



So that was a mouthful but I'm done now. I'm going to attach the survey as text. Respond however you like, and feel free to ask if you have questions.

[ Text ]

Name:
Age: (on a scale of pubescent to menopausal, if you want)
Place of origin:
Place of kidnapping:
Year of kidnapping:
Occupation:

Name: Stephanie Brown
Age: 17
Place of origin: Gotham, New Jersey, USA
Place of kidnapping: Gotham, New Jersey, USA
Year of kidnapping: 2015
Occupation: Student

Comments

[spoileralert]

[ Okay that's actually pretty fair. ]

Assuming I believe you, how does that work? Why?

[fifty]

I don't think what I'm saying is that much weirder than what everyone else is saying. [Dragons and magic and alchemists and time travel!] I guess, basically, we show up when there are people who are all a group living there. Like, I didn't show up in 1492, people had to start colonizing first. And then because they're one group of people someone like me is born! In a forest or a field somewhere. And we represent what that group feels and wants and stuff.

But, I mean, it's not like we really got instructions on the how and why when we were born, I just know what I feel and stuff. If France was here he'd explain it in this weird way that's all philosophical and doesn't really help anyone.

[spoileralert]

[ Yes this is pretty weird and on par with alternate universes and time travel. ]

So, the world pops out a baby nation. And you guys... hang out? I mean, the UN didn't come around for a while.

[fifty]

When we're little we mostly wander around. Well, I don't know about everyone, but a lot of us do. You know, 'cause we're little kids and we don't really know what's going on. But after that we work with our bosses and do what they say. We fight in wars with our people--that's not really an order but I don't know anyone who doesn't 'cause our people are fighting for us, you know?

[America is very earnest, at least, about how much he cares about his people. Even if his description is not the most specific thing in the world.]

So before we had world meetings we'd talk to our neighbors and allies and stuff. Or yell at them. Or punch them.

[spoileralert]

You have bosses?

[ Skippin ur shenanigans forward to the important stuff! ]

[fifty]

Yeah! Mine's the President.

[spoileralert]

The president. And he just. He's cool with this. National secret number 382: the personification of our country is a teenager and I have him doing paperwork.

[fifty]

Basically? Except for the teenager thing. [Will America ever let that go? Probably not.] And really we have to do pretty much anything our bosses say, but lately it's like 90% signing things. And it's not really a secret since every country's got someone like me.

I mean, what else would he do even if he wasn't cool with it? I'd still be hanging around.

[spoileralert]

But- [ Shes grasping at straws here because she's actually starting to believe him. ] but they broadcast UN meetings!

[fifty]

The ones our representatives go to, yeah. They have a meeting and at the same time all of us have a meeting, too. I think ours aren't on TV 'cause usually there's a lot of yelling and stuff.

[Punching. Talking about food. Gossip. Many important things that shouldn't be on TV.]

[spoileralert]

Apparently it's my turn to have an existential crisis.

[ This is Steph for 'give me a minute'. ]

[fifty]

I didn't think we were that weird. But I guess if the different universes thing is happening then everything's gonna be confusing. ["The different universes thing" implies he's had some sort of different universes experience before.]

[spoileralert]

I'm just... I'm not used to all this magic and aliens and strangeness when it's not happening to somebody else far away.

There's a different universes thing?

[fifty]

Weird stuff happens to people like me sometimes. Usually around Christmas, though. Like this one time a bunch of alternate versions of us showed up because one of us had writing on us that would save their world.

[Also they had cat ears and tails and a lot of them were naked.]

Don't worry, I'll watch out for you! [From a tablet. Somehow.]

[spoileralert]

Sounds like a TV special. [ Which is the definition of dramatic irony. ]

Gee, thanks. My entire perception of reality falling out from under me is so much easier to take knowing I've got a teenaged personification of my country for moral support.

[ Now she's just doing it for the funsies. ]

[fifty]

Yeah, Christmas can be kind of weird for us. And I definitely look at least eighteen. [He will never stop saying this.] But I am a hero, and you're my citizen, so I'll do what I can 'cause it's what heroes do!

[Never mind that the paranoia issue has made it so the only reason America even replied was Steph said she was from the US. That's not the point.]

[spoileralert]

Eighteen is still a teen.

[ Just not even gonna touch the rest of that. ]

[fifty]

I'm still not a teen. I just look a little young, that's all!

[spoileralert]

It's the baby face.

[ so cruel ]