snowblindrpg | [log] God Must Hate Me [closed]

Entry tags:

[log] God Must Hate Me [closed]

Characters: House, the Joker, Luna, and Quark
Location Building 58
Date: Day 139/140
Summary: House really wasn't expecting the Joker to leave downtown... It's a heartfelt reunion! And maybe some decryption on the side.
Warnings: The Joker is his own warning, as is House. Will add specifics if/when they come up!

[The building is a simple single-story house, the snow weighs uneasily on it, and it creaks and groans under the strain at the best of times. It's very dark, and only the kitchen and living room are intact. The kitchen has a back door. Two snowmen have been built outside. A message has been written on the wall in blue ink: "Don't wreck the snowmen! That's super mean!" "ALPHONSE ELRIC, MAMI TOMOE, FREYA CRESCENT, GREED, EDWARD ELRIC, STEPHANIE BROWN, DAY FORTY ONE, TRAVELLING EAST." has been carved into one of the walls. The following has been written on the wall in blue pen: "This is Building 95 97 on the composite map. Contact @CaptSteveRogers for details." Underneath this is a fairly accurate map showing the house in relation to the school and buildings 29, 35, 35, 37, 40, 41, 47, 48, 50, 53. House 34 is labeled "Medical assistance; hot, clean water. Contact Dr. Epps @claytonator". The school is labeled "School. Food available in cafeteria; DO NOT STAY HERE OVERNIGHT." The shed is labeled "Shed".]

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[His skin crawls and he half-jerks away before realizing it's pointless. He's already been brought to heel here. Acquiescing might just make him boring enough to ignore after the Joker's had his fun. The man likely won't focus on him for too long.

Hopefully.

While he lets himself be walked, House hunches his shoulders. He's pretty sure he hasn't had this much physical contact with another human being in the three months that he's been here. Even half-freezing, he'd rarely done more than sleep near or next to another person. He's certainly never put his arms around them.

When they make it to the couch, House grabs his pack and clutches it like a shield. He still has a few other weapons attached to it, but they both know those aren't getting used for now. At least he can try to use it as a barrier when he's forced to sit. He'll try to sit as close to the arm rest as possible and place his pack next to himself, rather than letting Joker sit down immediately to his side.]

[Joker allows House to sit a distance away. He rolls back his sleeve and extends an arm.]

Just so you know if you stick me with anything other than a needle there's gonna be words.

[House looks down at Joker's arm, then up at his face again, expression incredulous. He glances around the room a few times, even raising his hand above his brow as if spying something in the distance. A few seconds later, he turned one of his hands over and raised it before miming looking through the microscope again, then making a cutting motion.

Have you seen his microscope? House hasn't. He reaches into his pack and pulls out his notepad, an idea forming. The tunnels are no escape. They'll force him in certain limited directions. He needs something open. Like the school.

House draws up a quick picture of a microscope, then flips to a page that shows a rough map of the nearby area. He points to the school.]

[Joker sits back and presses his fingertips together.]

You don't have a microscope handy? I thought you were going down into the tunnels to see moi.

You weren't...going to try to skip out on our appointment, were you?

[Considering this is already a lie, he's going to have to snowball it. He was heading to get the microscope where it was actually stored in the hospital. It's a moment for him to draw an extra section on his map showing the tunnels and post office. He adds two stick figures to the side, one with a cane, and the other with green hair.

House taps the stick figure with the cane and traces a line to the school. He mimes picking up something and setting it down again. The microscope was put there. Then he traces a path down to the tunnels and over to the post office. He taps the green-haired stick figure next and traces with his finger from somewhere in the downtown area to the post office.

They meet up at the post office after he puts the microscope in the school.

House taps both stick figures, and traces another path with his finger back up through the ice tunnels and to the school.

Viola!

He just didn't want the Joker picking their ultimate meeting location. Clearly. That's it.]

[He tilts his head. It's all possible but the one factor that makes him skeptical...]

That seems like a very long way of doing it. You just wanted to travel with me for a while, is that it?

I don't blame you.

I'm interesting company.

[Okay. That's... uh. There are times when he's very, very glad he's a good bullshitter who can come up with things on the fly. House gives the Joker a flat look. 'Interesting.' Right.

The doctor sketches a bear trap, points to the Joker, then to the trap. He points to himself, then lets his finger circle downtown.

You wanted to trap him downtown. This forces it so that you can't.]

Oh, please.

If I was gonna trap you I'd be much more clever about it.

[He stands up and turns face House, their knees touching.]

Maybe you are trying to trap me?

Is that it? After our little talk are you gonna lead me into another ambush?

[He grabs the fireplace poker from the couch and presses its tip against House's throat.]

Give me one good reason I shouldn't kill you and spare myself the hassle.

[Mood Swing Molly. That's the Joker's new nickname. House is emotionally exhausted at this point. He keeps being almost not terrified again, and then this. What the hell does the guy expect him to say? Denial? There's no plans for an ambush. Yet. He just needs somewhere that he's actually familiar with if he's going to try to escape.

He could be glib, put his hands into a heart. That might end in the Joker laughing or just killing him to make a point. It might also end in the asshole kissing him again for being glib. House would rather avoid that.

House reaches into his pack and pulls out the juggling balls, juggling two of them one-handed for a moment.

He can be entertaining?]

Speechless, eh? Say something you sack of-

[Another coughing fit comes. He hacks into his fist and steps back as the coughing steals the breath from his lungs.

Breathe.

Breathe.

He collapses sideways to the floor, wheezing.]

['Say something.' Right. Screw you, too, moron. Things House would like to say. But then Joker is on the ground, hacking a lung out.

Is this a trick? Is he being tested? House stares, silent and on edge. Stealing the poker is just going to end up like the mallet. He could... try to murder the Joker while he's down? But for all that he'd like the clown dead, actively murdering someone is a hell of a lot different than assisting them in a clinical setting. And what if it is a test? The Joker could conceivably be faking all that to get House interested in what's wrong with him and gauge how he'll respond to a moment of weakness. It doesn't look like faking, but he doesn't know how good an actor the guy is.

There's no escape here. If he screws this up, either way he's dying. Either from a fireplace poker to the face or exposure. He could check the guy's vitals, but like hell is he touching the clown.

House draws his legs up and wraps his arms around them, just watching the other man on the floor. He's not helping, but he's too frightened and too trapped to take any other actions, either.]

[The Joker finally regains his breath and rolls over, putting his back to House so the other man can't see him mop a feverish sweat from his brow with his sleeve.]

I'm fine, thanks for asking.

[After a moment he stands again, retrieving the fireplace poker.]

I'm sick of being sick, Doc. It's not funny anymore.

[Is that supposed to engender sympathy? It would seem House just missed a golden opportunity, which is frustrating. But if the Joker thinks House feels sorry for him, he's clearly more insane than the doctor thought.

Suffer is the curse in his thoughts as he looks up at the Joker. There's absolutely no kindness in House's gaze. Puzzles interest him, not people. Especially not people who terrify him. He knows what's wrong with the Joker. There's little he can do about it without a better microscope to see anything other than little specks in the blood or proper treatment equipment and a guide for how to cure MN Poisoning.

The prospect of exploring the progression of the poisoning in various people has some merit, but he'd need more than just Joker to make it worth his while. Not to mention, there's the curiosity of House somehow keeping most symptoms at bay in spite of having died so often to make it a running joke.

House raise a brow at Joker, then puts the juggling balls away to pull out his notepad again. He just points to the school.]

I'll go.

[He gestures at the pad with his fireplace poker.]

If you start clowning with me I...won't kill you. But I'll make you wish I had.

[House nods, putting on his best impression of a cowed child. It's... not much of a stretch at this point. His mind is furiously working away at escape options for the school. He has tonight and maybe tomorrow to come up with a viable plan. Not a lot of time for someone who doesn't exactly make a habit of this sort of thing.]

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[log] God Must Hate Me [closed]

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Think we can fade here, unless you've got something else you want them to 'discuss'!