[network] @enhance; morning 108; going once... [open]

[plundering]

[The video starts off focused on Fiona, who looks pretty pleased with herself, and who is also dutifully wearing the flower crown Angel gave her on top of her hat.]

Hey, Norfinbury. Today’s your lucky day. I’ve got some stuff I don’t need.

[The camera pans down to a few items all organized neatly on the floor - a red, standard issue Norfinbury coat, a toothbrush, and most interestingly perhaps, two boxes of condoms. She picks one of these up.]

Besides the obvious, I’m sure you can find a few uses for these. Waterproofing? A slimy purse? I’ll divide them up into lots if enough of you want them.

[She turns the camera around again, and gives the network an expectant smile.]

So, let’s hear what you’ve got. Make me some offers.

Comments

@jwatson; text

[jumpthegun]

[There is an attractive woman offering condoms. Well, that's certainly a thing.]

Suppose condoms are one way for them to tell us to keep warm however we can.
Are you sure you want to be giving up that coat or toothbrush, though?
Weather like this, you'll want to hold onto as many layers as you can.
And it doesn't look like we've got any dentists on staff.

@enhance; video

[plundering]

Don't worry, they're extras. Does that mean you want them?

[jumpthegun]

Don't have anything to trade unless you're in the market for favors.
Wouldn't mind offering a few favors, mind.

@prettypinkflowers; video

[lacecase]

Oh! Oh! I'd like to put in an offer for the condoms, please!

[How delightful! She knows Clayton had...well, at least one. But she's not gonna put all her eggs in one basket, if that's the right saying! She rummages through her things, looking a bit discouraged.]

I don't like...have very much I think you'd like, though? Unless you like cute shoes! Or, um, I have a couple umbrellas! And perfume...and magazines! [Not to be discouraged, her countenance perks right back up again.] I can like, sew really well, though, so if there's anything you need to keep warm or just fixed up or whatever, I, like, can totally make as much as you'd want or need! No problem at all!

@enhance; video

[plundering]

You can sew, huh? What could you make for me?

[lacecase]

Oh, like, you know.

[Ginger, that isn't an answer that anyone but you understands.]

The hardest thing is finding fabric. I hear there's a store downtown with a bunch of summer things. I'd totally love to get my hands on some of those! I can barely find anything around here...but I do have a towel and a bit of t-shirt and some other scraps left! I can probably make mittens out of those, or socks...but if you want anything more substantial and you have any extra fabric you found, I'd totally transform it into something cute for you!

@dissect; voice

[circumsutus]

I didn't realize you sewed. [Has anyone ever heard a more blatant lie in all of Norfinbury's history? Everyone knows that Ginger sews things. But Stein's voice is cheerful, and he's just making friendly conversation. Right? Of course.]

We'll have to meet up some time and complain about the lack of sewing supplies here.

[Just a friendly conversation, obviously.

Yep.]

@Ecks | text

[ecks]

What is the obvious? What is in the boxes?

Offer for coat dependent on content of boxes

@enhance; text

[plundering]

Uh. They're condoms.

[Please say you know what condoms are, @Ecks.]

Audio | @Rdua

[blessedmaiden]

[She actually noticed WAtson and Ginger's posts and between 'keeping someone warm', being waterproof and how interesting they seem....She wants a condom. Whatever it is.]

I have some bottles of sweet liquids I could trade for one? Green-addine and club soda for one of those obvious things? I may need someone's help to figure out how they're supposed to keep me warm if I get one but- maybe we could share the heat?

[But, seriously, what is a condom anyway? Ginger seems so eager to get one!]

@CaptSteveRogers; voice

[starsandtights]

[...Oh God. MORE FACEPALMING. Steve clears his throat.]

Rydia, those are, um. ...Their purpose is to allow people to have sex without having to worry about pregnancy or. Diseases. [This is the worst, everything is terrible.] Dr. Watson was being euphemistic. ...Fiona's right, though, they can be repurposed for other things, latex is useful stuff. Good for carrying water, for one.

@CaptSteveRogers; video

[starsandtights]

[Steve does a quick network check before he and Peggy head out for the day, and... facepalm. Literal facepalm.

He wants those condoms, of course he fucking does, but he would've preferred a private interaction. WHY THIS.

...Well. Time to man up, Rogers. Settling down next to his packs, he takes a deep breath and dredges up his best poker face—actually quite effective, just ask Dum-Dum—and switches video messaging on. He clears his throat.]

Got no need of a coat or a toothbrush, but. Sure, let's say I'm interested in a slimy purse. Or several. [He holds up an unopened pack of cigarettes.] Starting bid.

@enhance; video

[plundering]

Nice. That'll get you three.

[Yes, very reasonable.]

@gravedigger; voice

[harlequinofhate]

I will give you my bracelet!

@enhance; video

[plundering]

It had better be a pretty awesome bracelet. Let's see it.

action;

[phaseshifter]

[ Don't mind Angel just. Boggling at her tablet. Boggling. ]

I can't believe there's - that there's more than one, uh, interested party. I mean, it's. It's cold! And as far as I know, only Ginger is - she's the only one who - who, um, has a. A reason to need them.

[ Is she going to have to make some updates to the shipping spreadsheet after all this? OH NO ]

[plundering]

[Oh no, Angel, your shock is kind of ridiculous.]

Do you keep that close of an eye on who "needs a reason" for condoms?

@fenrir; voice;

[meteorrains]

[Fiona what are you doing?]

Interesting business venture.

@enhance; video

[plundering]

Hey, a girl's gotta eat. Are you in or not?

@dissect; text

[circumsutus]

I can give you vague promises of future medical assistance or favors.

Or sewing, if you need some clothes.

@enhance; video

[plundering]

Vague promises are lame, and I've already got a sewing offer. Anything else?

@Ecks | text

[ecks]

In exchange for the coat I offer a tin of tea leaves.

@enhance; text

[plundering]

You're gonna have to sweeten the deal a little.

action;

[headjacked]

[ Guess who is having a better day today? It's early yet, sure, but. Still.

He sounds rather lucid when he pipes up from the blanket pile. ]

I'd say I'm surprised by the response you're getting buuuuuut I absolutely am not.

[plundering]

[Early or not, Fiona will take it. She's been more worried about Rhys than she's admitted, although maybe it's become obvious over the past couple of days.]

I wouldn't be getting this response if it weren't for my technique.

[It's definitely not the condoms in a town of sex starved people. Definitely not.]