[log] reunited and it feels so good [closed]

[powersouls]

Characters: Alfie and Tifa
Location Building 90
Date: Day 139
Summary: Meeting up again! Crying about Royce. The usual.
Warnings: None, probably!


[Tifa heads out to meet Alfie by herself. When she'd first arrived, she would have avoided that at all costs, but it just isn't realistic anymore. And besides, she's starting to think traveling alone is safer than traveling in a group, even if she'd never do it for a long stretch.

Royce is dead now, too. Killed, this time, and Tifa is trying very hard not to deal with it. She's trying very hard not to deal with Cloud's death as well, partially because she's afraid if she thinks about it too much, she might have some sort of awful breakdown. It's still entirely possible that they'll both come back, and that's what she's clinging to as she opens the door. Alfie came back, after all. At least she still has him.

She finds him dozing when she arrives, or at least she thinks he is, and for a moment she considers not waking him. She hovers just inside the room for a moment, and then, very quietly:]

Alfie?

Comments

[devoutish]

[He's awake - he's just tired. He hadn't slept very well the night before. The houses without beds make him feel like he's in the army again, having to relearn how to snatch bits and pieces of sleep in less than ideal temperatures and uncomfortable positions.]

Yeah.

[He counts to three in his head, then hauls himself up to his feet.]

[powersouls]

[Tifa stays where she is for a moment. She's fine. She's fine. She's not going to do something stupid and childish like start crying, and she actually manages not to. After a second or so, though, she realizes she's not going to be able to keep herself from hugging him, so she just gives in and does it, dropping her bag to the floor.]

I'm glad you're okay.

[Admittedly, her voice is a little shaky.]

[devoutish]

[This time, he's pretty much expecting it. He even settles an arm around her shoulders.]

I would've chosen a different house, if I could have. Look at this place.

[powersouls]

[She shakes her head. Considering the height difference, her face is buried in his shoulder, but whatever.]

It's okay. It doesn't matter.

[devoutish]

You wouldn't be saying that if you'd spend the night here.

[He pets her hair, just a little.]

[powersouls]

[The hair petting is sweet, and something twists in her chest for just a moment. Keep it together, Tifa.]

Do you think they'll come back?

[devoutish]

Dunno.

But you know the odds.

[He says it gently, but also matter-of-factly.]

[powersouls]

I know, but...

[Yep, that's her voice breaking, and she swallows.]

[devoutish]

All right, all right. You're all right.

[The hair-patting turns into a soothing hair-stroke.]

[powersouls]

[One shaky breath in, and she thinks she's got it under control. She's still holding back the tears, at least.]

I'm so sick of... of losing people.

[devoutish]

You will get through this. Yeah? All right.

He's got all his things on him. I had Watson leave them.

[powersouls]

I know, I know, I just... We're going to go get him, right? If he comes back.

[devoutish]

Yeah. Of course we will, yeah.

[He pats her back.]

He'll be right sick of us.

[powersouls]

[She laughs a little, strained and weak.]

Isn't he already?

[devoutish]

If you believe what he says.

[Alfie's voice gets a little tighter.]

There's something else you should know.

[powersouls]

[Tifa pulls back finally, but not fully. She keeps her hands on his arms as she looks up at him.]

What is it?

[devoutish]

Watson tried to tie Duster up. They struggled.

[There's tenseness in his face, and in his voice.]

That's why Ecks was able to kill him so easily. He was distracted and restrained.

[powersouls]

He...

[For a moment, Tifa is at a loss for words. She can't quite process it. Doesn't want to process it.]

Why? Why was he trying to tie him up?

[devoutish]

He found out about House. Ecks figured it out and told him; Duster confirmed.

[powersouls]

But... Duster wasn't going to do anything.

[And, really, Tifa has never understood why people seem to default to trying to pull some sort of citizen's arrest here. She didn't agree with it when Steve did it, and she doesn't agree with it now. Beyond her general lack of trust in any sort of formal justice system, considering ShinRa's complete control over it at home, it doesn't make any sense in this situation. It's not like they can throw people in jail.

Plus, the thought of Royce being killed while he was trying to fight against being tied up is horrifying in a way she couldn't have imagined. God. She swallows, trying to keep her voice steady, but it just comes out small and trembling.]

He couldn't even defend himself.

[devoutish]

He's feeling guilty over it. I'm gonna let that continue.

[Because seriously.]

[powersouls]

[Tifa won't even argue against that.]

He should feel guilty.

[devoutish]

[He and Tifa definitely don't agree on everything - he knows they hadn't agreed about what Royce had done to House - but he really is glad they agree on this. He gives her a little squeeze.]

[powersouls]

[She squeezes back, of course.]

He'll be okay. He'll come back.

[Or so she tells herself.]

[devoutish]

You need to prepare yourself in case he doesn't.

[powersouls]

[Tifa doesn't deal with death. She never has. She just pushes it down and gets angry, like she did with Nibelheim, like she did with Aerith. Again, there's another pause, until she responds very quietly.]

I don't know how.

[devoutish]

You've lost before. What did you do then?

[powersouls]

[She hates talking about this. It's so hard for her, but she forces the words out.]

After Nibelheim, I... I joined AVALANCHE. [She's quiet, again.] I told myself I was doing it to help, but... I don't think that's true anymore. Not completely.

[It was absolutely for revenge, she's just too ashamed to admit it out loud.]

[devoutish]

What was the rest of it?

[You can say it, Tifa; come on.]

[powersouls]

[Ugggh, Alfie, don't make her. She's burying her face in his shoulder again, so the words come out muffled, but still audible.]

I was angry. I wanted to get back at ShinRa.

[Okay, mostly true, but:]

I guess I still do.

[devoutish]

[Don't worry Tifa, he won't make you talk about it much. He does mentally file that information away, though.]

I told Fiona I didn't blame him. Before he came and explained, I said it wasn't his fault.

[And of course, he hadn't known. But it still makes him angry to think back on. The words taste bitter in his mouth.]

[powersouls]

[It's a relief that he switches topics, honestly.]

You didn't know, Alfie.

[devoutish]

Of course not. I still wish I hadn't said it, even if it wasn't to him.

[powersouls]

[Okay, she... doesn't get this.]

Why?

[devoutish]

Because thinking it is in my memory. Saying it is in my memory.

It's not important.

[Which is true - it's a little annoyance that niggles at him, nothing more.]

[powersouls]

[Tifa pulls back again, letting out a breath as she nods. Okay. She won't press.]

Where are we going to go tomorrow?

[Push on to the tunnel, he's probably going to say.]

[devoutish]

I've got food for Kesara. I wanna find supplies for her, too. But finding them isn't gonna be as easy as finding each other out here - they're in unknown territory. There are no maps.

And if he comes back, we're gonna want to pick him up.

[He raises an eyebrow at her.]

How well did you sleep last night?

[powersouls]

[She shrugs, looking away sheepishly.]

I didn't much.

[devoutish]

Neither did I.

[And if he'd gotten the news before the morning, it probably would have been even worse.]

Listen - I'm not sure if he told you, but Ecks was killed this morning, by an anomaly. We should go slowly, and be very fucking careful.

[powersouls]

[Another nod!]

Right. We can stick close together.

[devoutish]

The closest house to here is 49, but we don't wanna be there.

[That's the house where Royce had died. His body might still be there.]

There's another to the south that I saw coming in. It isn't on House's map.